Will You Really Be Happy as a Stay-At-Home Parent?

Just when it seems to be abating, the debate between working outside the home parents and parents who stay home to care for children manages to find its way into popular culture. There are various belief systems about what is best for the child and what is best for families and proponents of both sides can site evidence to back up their claims. One thing that IS important for parents who are considering staying home to care for children (in addition to considering what will be best for the child) is whether or not mom or dad will be happy and content staying home? Individual parents need to ask themselves: "Will you really be happy as a stay-at-home parent?"

An unhappy parent results in an unhappy child and an unhappy family. Surely there are those that would argue that the parent's happiness takes second (or third or fourth) to the child's and that no matter how miserable it makes a parent, if the studies support stay-at-home parenting that is what should be done. But is that really true?

There are so many things to consider when evaluating whether or not stay-at-home parenting is right for you. As a family, you will need to look at finances and determine whether or not it will be financially sound for a parent to stay home, and/or whether day care will fit into the family budget. Will the parent be harming their career or earning potential by taking time off to be a stay-at home parent? Is the person who plans to stay home planning to stay home forever or will he or she be returning to work eventually? Are you someone who can see yourself entertaining and caring for an infant or toddler for an entire day; day after day? If you strongly identify with your work, need a great deal of adult and outside stimulation, or have a hard time spending hours and hours uninterrupted with your child--you might want to think hard about whether stay-at-home parenting is right for you.

In this day and age there are multiple options for parents--there is not just one right or wrong answer or one right and one wrong approach to parenting small children. Perhaps you can stay at home but you need to do some part-time or home-based work? Perhaps you can take a few months or a year off but that is all you feel you can do without sacrificing your sanity and/or happiness? Take the time to truly think about what you want and what you are capable of and not just what you think is expected. Talk to other parents--both stay-at-home ones and those who work outside the home and listen to what they have to say about their experiences. Do as much research as possible and give yourself some "trial time" to figure out whether or not being a stay-at-home parent will be a choice you can be happy making.