10 Harmless Ways to Get Back at Your Spouse

My husband and I are often referred to as the The Bickersons. People notice our back and forth banter and perceive it to be fighting when in reality it's just the way we communicate. I'm feisty and spicy and he's bullheaded and stubborn; a match made in heaven. Having said that, there are times when he truly aggravates me and I've learned how to counter it with a little harmless revenge that keeps him on his toes. So instead of arguing and fighting have a sense of humor and get revenge. Here are some ways to get back at your spouse without damaging your marriage.

1. A little cold water never hurt anyone. When your significant other is enjoying a warm steaming shower first thing in the morning, turn on the HOT water in some other part of the house. You don't want to burn your spouse so don't turn on the cold water unless you are really, really mad at them. The louder your partner screams the better your gratification.

2. Don't touch their car. I lied; you have to touch their car to do this. When your partner is not around, slip inside their car and turn the radio up full blast. Put the turn signal on, turn on the lights and flip on the heater. Don't say a word; just wait for them to go somewhere.

3. Place an ad. This works best if it's the wife placing the ad but either partner will suffice. Place an ad for your spouse in a gay dating newspaper or magazine. Use their cell phone number. Sit back and watch the confusion as your spouse answers gay call after call. This won't work if you are in a gay relationship so if you are, use a straight newspaper or magazine resource.

4. Move the food. You know how when you open the refrigerator and pull out all the fixings and you've crafted the perfect sandwich, your mouth waters in anticipation? Ever lost that sandwich? Wait for the opportune time when your partner makes themselves something to eat and walks away. When they aren't looking hide their snack where they will never find it and then act like you don't know what they are griping about. My husband does this to me all the time and it unnerves me to no end.

5. In every life a little confetti rain must fall.Pack your spouse's umbrella with confetti and wait for them to open it. The look on their face will be priceless.

6. Take the batteries out of all the remote controls. Your spouse will go crazy trying to figure out why none of the remote controls have batteries in them and then when your spouse is looking for new batteries; slip the old ones back in.

7. Sing in public if you can't carry a tune in a bucket with a lid on it. I can't sing a lick and my whole family knows it. So when my husband irritates me I start singing in public. He gets embarrassed and I just act like I don't know what the problem is.

8. The squeaky wheel gets the oil. Or something like that. Put one or two small marbles inside your partner's hubcaps. When the car is rolling it will make noise. When they stop the car to listen for the noise it stops. It could take them months to figure out what the problem is and by that time you'll have laughed your butt off. Just be nice enough to tell them what the problem is before they spend money to have the car checked out by a mechanic.

9. Ask for Bob. When your special someone calls you up in the middle of the day, disguise your voice and answer the phone with, "Hello, is Bob there?" Your spouse will most likely say, "You have the wrong number." And hang up before realizing that it was them that called you!

10. Peep your own yard. But don't tell anyone you are the one that did it or you might be the one to clean it up. Put a bunch of marshmallow peeps on a fork or stick and put them into the ground. This is an extended method of forking and it looks funnier. If you're really good you'll sneak into the yard in the middle of the night and plant the peeps.

There you have it, ten ways to get revenge and stay laughing. Every married couple gets on each other's nerves. It's a part of human nature but instead of arguing and fighting turn that irritation into a joke so that you can concentrate on how much fun you have together as a couple.