10 Reasons Not to Write My Life Story

Someone once asked me why I hadn't written my life story. I pondered that for several days and came up with some very valid reasons not to write my life story.

I have already lived it and some of it I would never want to relive, even if I was only writing about it. I'm just glad that I made it through those rough spots in my life. As for the great stuff, well, I can't go back and I want to have other great things to look forward to.

If I wrote my life story then there would be no air of mystery left for people to wonder about. It would all be right there in black and white. Where's the fun in that?

The rumor mills have already enhanced things enough without me starting them up again. I really think they could spend their time on better subjects. Besides, isn't it your turn?

My children might hold my past against me. I really don't need to hear, "But mom, you got to do it..." and then have to re explain why it wasn't a good idea in the first place and the consequences of it. They already suspect you know.

My parents might find out what I did to their car when I was first driving. When I was drag racing the yellow camaro in their grand torino sport (which beat the socks off the camaro since my car had the 351 Cleveland engine). Then I would have a lot of explaining to do. My mother already wonders why the police followed her all over town when I was first learning to drive.

At many points in my life it was simply boring. Who would want to read such a boring article? I mean seriously.

I might have to explain how that purple stain got on my mothers living room rug when I was 15. I really don't want to have to go into that with her. It was complicated enough to hide it the first time. I hope she never moves that throw rug.

My old friends might recognize who I am and hunt me down for some of the pranks I pulled. Its safer this way, I won't have to come out of hiding and face their wrath.

I think its simply more exciting this way, it keeps people wondering what all I have done in my life.