10 Things You Shouldn't Do at a Funeral
Should You Stay or Should You Go?
Never bring divorce papers to a funeral. Death to marriage can wait.
Do not propose at a funeral. Sure, it will be a moment they will never forget. But for all the wrong reasons.
Don't bring a mistress of the deceased.
Never ask someone to stand next to the coffin for a group shot.
Don't make calls during the eulogy.
Never entertain at a funeral as if it's happy hour. "I drink too much. When they embalm me they're going to find olives."
Do not bring your own food or have a pizza delivered to the funeral.
Do not bring a gun to shoot into the sky next to the coffin, unless you are standing next to other uniformed men with permits to carry, lock, and load.
Do not invite mourners to a disco after the funeral. The last thing they want to do is shake or grind after their loved one dies.
Do not ask out the spouse of the person that died. That means no slipping them your phone number and address with a wink.
Now, some of these moments you may have witnessed. And as it may, life goes on. But when you tend allow your own needs to come before the needs of the passing and those who mourn perhaps it would be best to stay home and watch Hangover. Which by the way is hilarious and it will take your mind away from not attending one of the most boring hours of your life.
Don't worry, Hangover will be available when your funeral arrives.
As for funeral etiquette, remember, there is no "i" in dead.
Published by Lori Lane
Lori Lane is a published poet, active electronic journalist, technical writer, fitness center staff member. Lori Lane welcomes questions or feedback. View profile
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13 Comments
Post a CommentGreat tips, agree on these!
Good tips.
Great tips for when I go to MY funeral! Oh... wait. Seriously though, too funny, Lori! What's sad is that there are probably people out there who have actually done those things.
I have responded to many disputes at many funerals in my line of work..this advice is sadly needed ;-) Well done!
Hey I knew a guy that took food to a funeral - He didn't order a pizza but he was munching on a bag of mini cheese crackers. He didn't stuff his face, but it was distracting.
pizza delivered? haaaaaa!!! :) jeffrey
I will remember these in the future.
Good reasons I don't go to funerals! Food?? Awh, come on?
Good tips.
Good ones, cheers