3 Things to Say on a First Date

No matter how many dates you've been on lately or if you've been out of the game and this is a major score in your dating rut, the first date is complex. Sure, you should create an intent when dating and focus on getting to know one another instead of planning the wedding and imagining the seating arrangement before the main course hits the table, but we sometimes just get ahead of the game like that. So before you begin to name the children you're planning on having and choosing china patterns, let's get through the first date. And here are three things every person should consider saying when on a first date

1. Compliment. We should be able to skip the first date and just jump into the second or third, but since it's not possible just yet, we have to go through the ritualistic torture of it all. There are many elements at play on that first date; nerves, insecurities, fear of saying the wrong thing. And then there's getting ready making sure you have the right combination of sexy, smart and mysterious. Dating pros don't go through this, they suit up and get in the game, but for the rest of us, showing up involves pep talks, wardrobes changes and a few pre-date drinks. So it would be nice to receive a compliment on that night filled with jitters, fright, and possibly dealing with a bad hair day. This will set the mood and get the two of you in the moment. If the other person is on the same page as you, they'll pick up the cue and shoot a "Wow, nice hooker-boots" right back at you. Give your date a compliment on that first meeting, and if that compliment isn't coming from a place of true genuineness, see tip 3.

2. A Truth. Somewhere in the evening, whether it's at the start or at the very end, say something truthful to the person. This makes it seems like everything up until this point has been a lie, but you know first dates can bring out certain qualities in us that we don't admire. A nervous laugh that makes you giggle at everything he says, even though it's not funny. Or you get a little too chatty and you start to agree with her viewpoint on art despite the fact you select your art from the Target catalog. We all do things out of character when on a first date and it may not be our true nature. So make it a point to say something truthful on the date, whether you really did enjoy the wine selection to whispering, "I think the waiter is having a rough night." Truth-telling will put you at ease and open up your comfort level and allow you to get on with the evening.

3. Tell a lie. It doesn't hurt but there has to be a purpose behind the lie, to create a little mystery, to establish your status as a sexy and sultry individual. "Oh, this old thing, it's not new" Not telling him that you ran out to make a new purchase just for the night isn't naughty, it's jut something that's between you and your credit card. If done correctly, the lie will add to the chemistry to the spark--if done wrongly it'll label you a liar, like if she asks about your obvious toupee and you claim it's just extra shiny because you switched shampoos--that's not gonna work. Remember, to create a little mystery, you create a little lie. Eventually, if date number two follows as done three or four, it'll be a great conversation starter when asked, "Tell us about your first date."