45 Days in County Jail

When I got up this morning, I prepared for jail. I had been here before and knew what to expect. As I was getting dressed I put on two pairs of underwear, a sports bra, and an extra t-shirt. After court I was immediately escorted away. I didn't get the chance to say good-bye to my mom who would now have to face the ten-hour drive back to NY alone. I was taken to a room behind the courtroom and waited for a female officer to escort me to the jail. My lawyer came in to speak with me briefly and apologize for "our loss." I didn't see where he'd lost anything; I would be the one in jail for the next 6 ½ weeks. I was driven to jail a short time later and upon my arrival was given my lovely white jumpsuit to change into. You don't get the orange jumpsuit to wear until you've been there five days. The white jumpsuits are disgusting and aren't really white any more. They carry with them the mixed smell of tears and body odor. I was allowed to keep the extra clothing I had donned this morning and was also given a bag containing: 1 cup, a flat sheet, a wool blanket, a washcloth, a hand towel, an extra jumpsuit, comb, deodorant, toothbrush, toothpaste, and soap. These things are to be my belongings for the next 45 days.

When I arrived at my "pod" everyone was locked back. I was sent to room 36. It was 2 pm and we were to stay in our room until supper. At 4 pm the doors were unlocked and we dinner was served. To explain dinner would be like asking a deaf person to explain silence. You can never truly understand unless you have been there. Dinner was two pieces of bread, beans and Kool-aid. In jail, food is a bargaining chip and is traded for everything. I was asked to sit at a table with four other women, mainly because people know that "newbies" don't eat and I was no different. After supper we were allowed a short period of TV time. The women overwhelmingly chose "Walker, Texas Ranger." At 6:45 pm we were locked back where we would spend the rest of the evening. Sleep in jail is never truly achieved and I slept bits and pieces that first night. The lights are on in your cell and are as bright as day. You have no pillow (I folded up the end of my straw mattress) and it is either very hot or very cold. I spent much of the night just lying there thinking about how I'd got to this place in my life. I tried to sleep and prepare myself for...day 2.