5 Essential Tips for Potty Training the Stubborn Child

The challenge of potty training a toddler can seem like a neverending adventure for some parents. Children of typical potty training age, generally between 1 1/2 and 3 years old, often take time to train, while testing the patience and efforts of their parents. Though some toddlers seem to master the task of potty training rather easily, there are those who seem to have their own agenda and pace, mixed with an ample amount of toddler stubbornness. Fortunately, there have been parents who have eventually been able to train their stubborn little ones with some tried and true advice from those parents who know exacltly what training a stubborn child entails. In fact, many parents themselves may have once been the same type of stubborn potty trainer who they now call their own.

Potty training mistakes are often made by parents who are eager to set deadlines for completing the potty training process. For most toddlers and early potty trainers, this is a goal that is not easily met on the first attempts. Parents who are willing to set aside some preconceived ideas about how long it should take the stubborn child to potty train, will be better prepared to start the potty training adventure.

Potty Training the Most Stubborn Child

Every parent who is struggling with potty training their child faces the possibility of potty training burn out. In order to survive the demands of potty training a stubborn child, parents may want to consider the following five tips.

1. Get Potty Training Education

Parents of stubborn children are likely to be familiar with their childrens' tendency to be strong-willed, long before the potty training adventure begins. Stubborn children tend to show this side of their personality in other areas of life, so it should be no surprise to their parents when they show stubbornness with potty training. Preparing for potty training by gathering some basic potty training education and information ahead of time will give parents of stubborn children some reference materials to fall back on when they hit a standstill with their stubborn child.

Most pediatricians have informational materials available for parents who are planning to begin potty training their child. The internet is another great source of information regarding the basics of potty training, and many of the name brand diaper companies offer potty training information for parents who seek it. Once potty training information is in hand, parents of stubborn children should begin to develop a plan that is most appropriate for the personality of their own strong-willed child, rather than rely on or be discouraged by general advice of others. Afterall, nobody knows how stubborn a child can be better than the parent of one.

2. Enlist a Potty Training Team

Stubborn children like to test the limits of their parents and often like to do things their own way, even as toddlers. Enlisting a team of the people in your child's life to assist with the potty training efforts will save both time and frustration in the long run. It is important to decide on a plan and inform all the important people who will be spending time with the child of what steps should be taken to encourage potty training. When people who spend significant time with a child who is potty training are not included, children will often fail to make the same potty training efforts under their care. If everyone is on the same potty training plan, most children, even the stubbornnest children, will realize it.

Some important people for a potty training team might include parents, grandparents, siblings, babysitters or daycare workers, and pediatricians. Since patience is especially important for potty training children, all relevant people should make an effort to remain calm, despite expected setbacks in the process. Parents can also use the potty training team to monitor and celebrate potty training milestones, as well as share their feelings when things are not going smoothly.

3. Relax

Perhaps even more important than any potty training guide or plan for success, is the attitude of the parents who embark on the potty training journey with a stubborn child. As difficult as it may be at times, a calm and relaxed approach to potty training a stuborn child will encourage eventual success. Children may not have the verbal abilities to express their feelings well, but they do have an uncanny ability to pick up on the emotional state of parents and caregivers. If potty training becomes a tense experience for both parents and child, it is likely to become more challenging.

Parents with stubborn children should take the time to find an outlet for their frustration with potty training when things are not going well or progressing. The worst possible reaction by parents is to scold or tease a child about potty training. Stubborn children will often step up their efforts of resistance when confronted with negative reactions, and ultimately the potty training experience will become a negative one for both parents and the child. Patience is essential when potty training the stubborn child.

4. Give the Stubborn Child Some Control

Stubborn children are likely to engage in regular power struggles with parents if potty training becomes a battle of wills. Frustrated parents are likely to give in or give up on such occassions and progress can stall or, in the worst case scenario, a stubborn child will regress in their efforts. Children who are stubborn by nature, are likely to enjoy a sense of control over potty training efforts, when given opportunities to succeed at their own pace. Rewards can be helpful, accompanied by a positive attitude toward any signs of progress on the child's part. Stickers and verbal praise for making attempts at using the potty encourage even stubborn children to want to try.

5. Take a Break from Potty Training if Needed

One of the biggest mistakes parents of stubborn children can make is to try to potty train prematurely. Stubborn children will resist even more when they are not developmentally ready or prepared for the demands of potty training. Though there are suggested age guidelines for beginning potty training, parents should also keep in mind the physical and cognitive abilities of their own children before starting potty training based on a specific age milestone. Children who show interest or a basic understanding of how their body functions are better prepared to succeed with potty training.

Potty training can take time, and parents of stubborn children may find that despite their efforts, their child is simply not ready to be trained. Many times, stubbornness or resistance can be a sign of a child not being ready to engage in the process of potty training yet. It is often parents who become stubborn in their efforts to succeed, even when evidence is lacking for potty training readiness. The best advice for a struggling potty trainer is to simply take a break for a month or so until the child appears more interested in trying. Ultimately, even the most stubborn children are potty trained.