5 Guaranteed Ways to Prevent Boredom!

If you are facing the risk of boredom, there is absolutely no time to waste! First, try to sterilize yourself with some alcohol or herbal remedies. Everything will be more entertaining, and you'll immediately lessen the risk of boredom.

So here are a list of more ways to better protect yourself from catching boredom.

1.) Using a digital camera, take still pictures of condiment bottles (ketchup, mustard, jelly, etc.) and create scenes for a story of your own creativity. (Using alchohol or 'herbal remedies' will enhance the creativity.)

You can try making a romance between dijon mustard and hellman's mayo, or peanut butter and jelly. You can make a story about the trials and tribulations of gay lovers cheap yellow mustard and spicy brown mustard. You can make a tragedy, a comedy, an adult film... whatever your little mind can come up.

Use a movie-making software (like Windows Movie Maker) to add captions and other things, turning your pictures into a movie. You can publish this movie on the internet and hope your video brings you 15 minutes of fame.

2.) Look up a gay hotline number. Call all your friends and tell them that you just heard a number on the radio station that is giving away free gift cards to the first 200 callers. Add in little details, like the value of the gift cards. Give them the hot line number and laugh hysterically as soon as you get off the phone.

3.) Drive to your local Wal-mart or K-mart or Target or whatever other store in your neighborhood that is always packed full of shoppers. Grab a cart and try the following:

(A) Grab condoms, pregnancy tests, lube, and other things of a sexual nature. Drop these items into random carts as you travel around and watch from a distance where it is safe to laugh.

(B) Whenever someone speaks through the intercom speakers, freak out. "The voices are talking to me again!"

(C) Fill your cart with items out of other people's carts. Then leave the cart in the middle of an aisle. Go back to the entrance and grab another cart for yourself.

(D) Before you re enter the store, use the security camera with the little TVs (if applicable) as a mirror. Bruch your hair, put on lipstick... whatever floats your boat.

(E) If you can convince a friend or more to come to the store with you, play a game of Marco Polo.

(F) Finally, buy a $20 disposable helium tank and head home!

4.) Using that helium tank, sing a song with a helium voice. If possible, play old vinyls on the wrong setting so the music you are singing to is as "chipmunk-y" as you. Change the message on your answering machine and record a new one using your helium voice. Call a friend and try to "breathe heavily into the phone" to freak them out... with a helium voice. Call a radio station and request a song with a helium voice.

Wait patiently for a telemarketer to call. Don't worry, one will call! Hold a conversation with the telemarketer... in a helium voice.

5.) You know what, you could also try getting off the couch feeling sorry for yourself and do something useful like clean the house. Ha ha, just kidding. But "seriously" now, try to walk on your hands. Try it inside or outside, it doesn't matter. You won't be bored, that's for sure.

If you break your neck or hurt yourself in any way... you can go to the emergency room and bring your helium tank to entertain yourself for the long hours spent in the ER waiting room!