5 Mother's Day Gifts for Cheap Bastards
Of course, she might have raised you to be a cheap bastard.
Not to worry, there are a lot of great gifts you can grab for your mom without spending too much scratch while still giving the impression that you value everything she's done for you. Here are some of the best gifts possibly for a very minimal amount of money.
5. 24 - 1st Season DVD - While not really the most personal gift, there's nothing quite like the adventures of Jack Bauer for pretty much anyone who enjoys good television (yes, mothers included), and you can pick up the first season at Target or online for around $30. If you want to be a decent son or daughter, go ahead and watch a few episodes with your mom. It makes for great conversation.
4. Tulips and a nice card. Don't get a crappy card, either, with the poems in cursive and all that bull. It means a lot more if you write your own inscription and try to make it at least a little loving. Just be sure that it's not too saccharine, either--be sincere and frank. For extra points, send the flowers to her at her work (assuming she works). She can show off that her kid's better than everyone else's.
3. An iTunes Playlist. iTunes lets you create a playlist of songs and then gift that playlist to your mother--a great idea for a gift under $20. Just pop 20 songs together and send it her way, and you've got the added bonus of appearing thoughtful. Voila! Instant gift for minimal cash.
2. Cook her a nice meal. Learn how to make some chicken or something. If you're in a typical family, she does the cooking most of the year, and even if you've been out of the house for a while, it's real nice to stop by and cook up a good dinner. If you're a really, really bad cook, you can always buy a roasted chicken at the local Dierberg's (usually they're around $6) and claim that you cooked it yourself. But c'mon, man, she's your mother--she'll figure it out. You awful, awful person.
1. Leave her the hell alone. If you've got younger brothers or sisters, take 'em out for a day and give your mother a day to herself. You can give her presents and all of that other stuff later, but it's worth noting that your mom doesn't get a lot of time to just do whatever the hell she wants.
Published by Phil Dotree - Featured Contributor in Arts & Entertainment and Technology
Phil Dotree has written copy for numerous websites and news sites for five years. His articles have appeared on the Howard Stern Show, Fark, Digg.com, and more. Phil is currently working on a book about fr... View profile
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