5 Reasons Girls Shouldn't Shave Their Legs
1. Ingrown Hairs
If you like ingrown hairs, raise your hand. I personally have never experienced the pleasure of having an ingrown hair burrowing beneath the skin on my leg, but I hear they're devine. No really, common shaving methods often hurt or irritate the hair follicle, resulting in a hair uprising. Both in the sense of growing upwards, and as in, revolting against a higher power. YOU. Consider Exhibit 1 as you ponder the topic at hand:
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2. Rape
Rape is a sad thing that, believe it or not, still happens today. As they teach in the women's groups, rape can be prevented IF you are prepared. So the next time the guy in the shiny metallic short sleeve shirt starts eye balling you at your local club hot spot, just hike up your leg on the bar and give him a taste of his own medicine. Hair medicine that is. But really, what guy is going to rape you if you have more hair on your legs than he does?
In a recent poll of guys aged 18-21, a staggering100 percentsay that they would rather sleep naked in a bed with R.Kelly than to rape a girl with bear legs.
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3. Objectifying
Strong women throughout the world (when I say 'world', I mean the USA and when I say 'strong' I mean lesbians) have fought hard (when I say 'fought', I mean held picket signs and wrote strongly worded letters) to preserve their right to choose and be independant from the evil men who are the bain of their very lives. They see a guy open a door for a lady or pay for the bill and they say "Why can't WE open doors and pay for bills? We're just as good as they are!" Women like these would argue that shaving your legs makes you more appealing to the beady eyes of men and therefore objectifying yourself.
Noone wants to be seen as a raw piece of meat do they?
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4. To be Amish
Why would anyone want to be Amish you may ask? Well for one, they don't pay social security tax. That means that the clever bastards can sell all the corn and hay they want to eachother and not have to fork over any money to the government! There are also some other advantages of daily living such as:
1. NO gang warfare!
2. NO "out of network" signal!
3. NO spam mail!
4. NO guilt for rolling up their windows on pan handlers!
5. NO running water! .....wait.....
Think of everything you're missing! And once you take the simple step of becoming Amish, there will never be any temptation to shave again! (cause old man Fisher will wrap your knuckles like a catholic nun to a disruptive school boy)
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5. Add spice to your relationship
You complain that you want more communication from him and he complains that he wants to see more of your wild side. Nothing will usher in an exciting night like your boyfriend thinking he's petting your dog, only to find out that it is your knee cap. It will have him asking all sorts of delicous communication filled questions, such as:
"Dude, WTF?"
"Dude, WTH?"
"Dude, WTFH?"
"Dude, WTH is going on?"
Letting the hair run a muck on your legs is a sure fire why to get your relationship up to par and into gear.
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So as you can see, NOT shaving your legs will benifit your safety, abstinance, independence, wallet, and love life.
Thank you.
Published by Johnny Digital
I am a journalism major who enjoys writing satirical articles on daily life. View profile
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23 Comments
Post a Commentok the hair was put there for a reason when it gets cold ur legs get really cold its bullcrap ur leg will get irritated if u ave in grown hair and maybe even itch so y do it ??
Hi, I think that shaving is not necessary
and should not be ashamed of this,
it's so sexy, the people specially those sites provide,
where only hairy women, here's a look here
<a href='hairytrade.com'>hairytrade.com</a> and see what all the hairy.
When I went to Canada I shaved my legs a week and a half before I went and my underarms the day before I left. But because of using it then I forgot to pack it.
Once in Canada and wanting to shave my underarms I found I had no raiser and I thought "Crap! People are going to think I'm weird" so I hid my upper arms.
But hold on! It's my f*cking body. Why should I care what anybody else thinks?
So by the end of the holiday I felt free and liberated because I chose what to do about MY body hair and no-one stopped to stare at me.
I no longer shave my legs and rarely shave my armpits. Some girls at school think it's weird. But that's their problem
I just wanted to say a few words on this matter. I think some of these posts are very old and no one will probably end up reading this but I still feel I need to respond. I am 28 years old and I have recently stopped shaving my legs and under my arms! I feel both liberated from the daily nonsense of having to remove hair from every inch of my body (for what, really..) and sort of above all you girls who instead of opening your minds and thinking outside the box believe that women who don't shave are sexualy unattractive and unhygenic. In the 1920s, middle class white men needed to settle down and have families with middle class white women. This movement towards the hairless female expanded to the idea that it was a woman's duty to be sexually attractive in order to catch and keep a man, therefore had to shave her armpits.
If a woman has this hair and does not get rid of it in a timely, regular fashion, the hair is disgusting, and she, in turn is also disgusting. Please!!!
Joking about rape, particularly joking that rape is a compliment to one's looks, can usually only be pulled off if the joke is really really amazingly funny - like so funny that even Germaine Greer has to supress a giggle. In this case, it's not even slightly funny, so all that's left is the insensitivity and ignorance.
NONSENSE IT IS SUCH A CRAP
this is retarted...i mean who doesnt want to shave their legs! I hate women that have hairy legs!
bullSHIT.
this is shitty. your sense of humor is strong (not good, just strong) but the voice in which it's delivered is poor, making the jokes fall flat and just sound crude
Idontknowexactlywhatdoesaguymeanbyaskingsomeonetoshavebetweenyourlegs.Idoshavemylegsandmyarmpitbutwhenmybfaskedmebyshavingbetweenmylegsidontknowwhathemeans.Doihavetoshavemypriviteplace?isthatwhathemeansaboutit?