Getting engaged is a very exciting experience for both people involved. If you are planning to pop the question to your girlfriend in the near future, you've probably been thinking a lot about engagement ring shopping. Although some guys like the idea of a more traditional approach in which they pick out the ring to surprise their girlfriend with, it's a much better idea to let your girlfriend choose the one she wants. Here are five reasons why.
1. She knows what she wants. Sure, she may have told you that she prefers platinum over gold or that she doesn't want a huge stone, but do you really know what she wants? Would she prefer to have a solitaire ring, a single diamond with side stones, or a three-stone ring? Four prongs or six prongs? Princess cut, round brilliant cut, cushion cut, oval cut, or another cut? Does she even want a diamond? Some women want something more unique or do not believe in diamonds due to ethical reasons. No matter how much you might think you know what your girl wants, chances are that you might not.
2. She will have to wear the ring for as long as you are married. My motto is, "If I have to wear it for the rest of my life, I'm choosing what I want." I know a lot of other women who feel the same way. If your girlfriend hates the engagement ring that you choose and she loves you enough, she won't tell you and risk hurting your feelings. Instead, she'll wear it everyday feeling resentful that you didn't let her choose the ring of her dreams. Is that what you really want?
3. Some women find it offensive for a man to pick out the engagement ring. That's right, offensive. For some women, a man picking out the ring may seem to indicate that he wants to control every aspect of their future together. She might be afraid that you'll want to take control with everything else, like the home that you will live in together and the way you raise your children. Unless you're the type of guy who expects to order your wife's meal at a restaurant, allowing her to choose her engagement ring is in your best interest.
4. You will pick your own wedding band. Generally, men choose the wedding band that they want to wear. Need I say more? If you're going to be picking out the ring that you will have to wear for the rest of your life, it only seems fair that your girlfriend should be able to choose her engagement ring.
5. She can't blame you if she hates it one day. If you let her choose it, you can remind her that it was her choice.
Keep in mind that you can surprise your girlfriend with a proposal and still let her pick out the ring. Ask her to give you a ranked list of engagement rings that she wants and choose one of the rings from the list. This will help ensure that she not only loves being engaged to you, but that she will love her ring as well.
1. She knows what she wants. Sure, she may have told you that she prefers platinum over gold or that she doesn't want a huge stone, but do you really know what she wants? Would she prefer to have a solitaire ring, a single diamond with side stones, or a three-stone ring? Four prongs or six prongs? Princess cut, round brilliant cut, cushion cut, oval cut, or another cut? Does she even want a diamond? Some women want something more unique or do not believe in diamonds due to ethical reasons. No matter how much you might think you know what your girl wants, chances are that you might not.
2. She will have to wear the ring for as long as you are married. My motto is, "If I have to wear it for the rest of my life, I'm choosing what I want." I know a lot of other women who feel the same way. If your girlfriend hates the engagement ring that you choose and she loves you enough, she won't tell you and risk hurting your feelings. Instead, she'll wear it everyday feeling resentful that you didn't let her choose the ring of her dreams. Is that what you really want?
3. Some women find it offensive for a man to pick out the engagement ring. That's right, offensive. For some women, a man picking out the ring may seem to indicate that he wants to control every aspect of their future together. She might be afraid that you'll want to take control with everything else, like the home that you will live in together and the way you raise your children. Unless you're the type of guy who expects to order your wife's meal at a restaurant, allowing her to choose her engagement ring is in your best interest.
4. You will pick your own wedding band. Generally, men choose the wedding band that they want to wear. Need I say more? If you're going to be picking out the ring that you will have to wear for the rest of your life, it only seems fair that your girlfriend should be able to choose her engagement ring.
5. She can't blame you if she hates it one day. If you let her choose it, you can remind her that it was her choice.
Keep in mind that you can surprise your girlfriend with a proposal and still let her pick out the ring. Ask her to give you a ranked list of engagement rings that she wants and choose one of the rings from the list. This will help ensure that she not only loves being engaged to you, but that she will love her ring as well.
Published by Jody Morse - Featured Contributor in Health & Wellness
Jody Morse has a B.A. in English from East Stroudsburg University. As a sufferer of endometriosis, she enjoys writing about women's health issues. She has worked as an assistant wedding DJ, and is dabbling i... View profile
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6 Comments
Post a CommentI like your motto, Jody! I also like #5. The wife can't blame her husband if she chose the ring to begin with. When we got engaged, we lived on different continents, so going ring shopping together was out of the question. So I sent my husband lots of brochures and circled rings I liked the look of. He made a good choice.
Sophie
I agree, and picking it up together is not a wrong idea!
What a great resource your site is!! Very informative. I became a fan of your site today and I am looking forward to reading more.
:)
Great job.
good points