5 Simple Steps to a Happy Marriage

As funny as it may sound, the most valuable relationship tip (regarding how to fight fairly in a marriage...) is as
simple as that, because fighting naked is an unexpected way to control the tone of a conversation, keep passion alive in a marriage, and to shed a new light on whatever you think is worth fighting over.

That single piece of advice is so powerful that I could leave it at that... but please read on for more relationship tips about how to fight healthy for a stronger and happier marriage.

Watch what you say, but not as closely as watching how you say it.

How often have you felt that your spouse just doesn't listen to you?

If you're nodding in agreement right now (perhaps with a knot of frustration in your gut) then you should know your partner does listen to you... but (s)he probably only hears your tone. I'm sure you've heard the phrase "It's not what you say, but how you say it" before. Believe it, because it is very true and especially accurate regarding communication in a relationship.

Accept your partners' flaws... and try to improve your own.

"You always" and "you never" in an argument are phrases that deliver a much deeper message... "I don't accept you."

Chances are, you realized that nobody is perfect a long time ago. Then you said "I do" and after a while, you're comfortable with yourself but wondering why the flaws in your partner seem to be getting worse.

This is an approach that most couples take backwards. Rather than accepting your partner, you hope they will change. Meanwhile, you may or may not be trying to change yourself in the process. The most important thing to remember is that you have to accept your partner the way they are.

In certain cases, this is also important when determining when to end a relationship. You shouldn't expect somebody to change, with or without your help, and if the problem is bad enough to call it quits... then it is time to end your marriage.

Examples of flaws that can't be worked through include abuse, addiction, and infidelity. In these cases, the best thing you can do is let go and move on with your life, because you deserve better. But when a marriage can be repaired or strengthened through better communication and healthier fighting... there are more communication tips to follow.

Cut to the chase already

If you find yourself repeating yourself or going through the same old tired argument... over, and over, and over again... it's time to cut to the chase. Dig deeper, and find the root of the problem. If you keep batting around for several years, you might eventually come to the real problem but it's much quicker to figure it out yourself, before you get into it again.

Discovering the root of a problem is the only way to pull that ugly weed out of the garden that should be colorful and full of blooming flowers (and cute little puppies and fluffy bunny rabbits.)

Love doesn't have to be so difficult, sure there are complications but it's never that hard to have a healthy and happy relationship...

Have a positive approach to disagreements.

So name calling and yelling aren't going to get you very far. It's really easy to take a disagreement and make it a negative thing; in fact a disagreement can easily destroy a relationship when it is handled negatively.

The alternative is to focus on taking a positive approach to disagreements. Offer to compromise, and suggest solutions or attempt to provide ideas that might lead to a happy medium.

The point of a strong marriage is to do everything within your power to make your partner happy, and keep yourself happy. When there is a challenge, you can overcome this obstacle by settling for being "less unhappy" if it means you have a stronger marriage.

And finally, because it is worth repeating over and over again... if you must fight... do it naked!