5 Tips to Help Rekindle a Past Relationship

Throughout life, we face many challenges. As a child, I was alienated from my adoptive family. I had very little contact with my parents and was very content on living my life without a family. When I became married and pregnant with my oldest daughter, I had decided it was time to rekindle a relationship with my adoptive family. This process was anything but easy, but I knew it was something I had to do. Here are some tips for patching up a relationship with your parents, or really anyone.

Tip #1 - Making the Decision

Before you can patch up any relationship, you must make the decision, based on your needs and wants. What does the relationship mean to you? Is it worth the risk of rejection? Have you properly identified what caused your relationship to fall a part? These are just some questions you should ask of yourself in the decision making process. I would recommend making a list of the pros and cons of the relationship and starting from there the decision can be made.

Tip #2 - Be the Bigger Person

If you are trying to patch up a relationship with someone, you must take the initiative by being the bigger person. Of course, you will have to swallow your pride, but it will show the other person you are willing to try. Even if the person with whom you wish to rekindle a relationship seems apprehensive or even rejects your advances, know that it will be worth it in the end.

Tip #3 - Start Small

With any relationship, always take small steps. You should not expect anyone to welcome you back into their lives with open arms. Try writing a letter or sending cards, every once in while. You could also try calling once a month or so and find out how the individual is doing. Keep phone calls short and friendly to avoid any backlash or resentful emotions from coming out. Once you have consistent communication you can start talking about the issues which caused your relationship to fall a part.

Tip #4 - Keep Focused

When discussing the problems your relationship had stay focused. Do not allow yourself to change subjects because it is too painful for either you or the other person to discuss. The only way to really have a great relationship again is to be open and honest with your feelings. If you keep your focus, it can really show that your intentions are genuine and not because you want to gain something other than a friendship or relationship with the other person.

Tip #5 - Be Patient

As with anything, you must be patient. You cannot expect your relationship to become perfect overnight. You must take each day and each telephone call one at a time. You cannot force someone to have a relationship with you and if they ask you not to communicate with them, by all means cease the communication. They may just wish to have contact with you on their terms. By respecting their wishes, they will know you are being genuine and they might just need some extra time to deal with their emotions.

These five tips can be helpful when trying to rekindle a relationship with someone you care about deeply. I have used these when deciding to reconnect with those I had left in my past. You must be prepared to be patient and take it one day at a time. I hope these tips will be of help in reconnecting with those in your past.

If you wish to read more articles by this author, please click on her name at the top of this article.