5 Ways Busy Couples Can Make Time for Each Other

One marriage flourishes while another falters and fails. For busy couples, the weight of overstuffed lives compounds the normal pressures of marriage. Unless the couple learns to set time aside to reconnect th each other and decompress from the stress of careers, children, and other commitments, they may find themselves in divorce court wondering what happened to their connubial bliss. Finding ways to make time for each other is not only a good idea, it is critical for marital success.

Start by establishing a date night.

This means that one night per week needs to be blocked out on both calendars. It does not have to be the same night each week. The couple needs to sit down each week and map out the next four or five weeks. By doing this exercise each week, two things are accomplished. First, it reminds both partners about theimportance of date night. It also gives a chance to make adjustments if unknown obligations come over the horizon to make a specific night a problem. Do this each week at a time other than your date. Otherwise, the date can just seem like another work event.

Set aside at least 30 minutes each evening to be together alone.

This can be tough to maintain if you have conflicting work schedules or young children at home. Try not to use this time for non-communicating activities. If one or both partners are doing an activity like reading, it does not achieve much for bonding as a couple. If you like the same movies or television programs, this can work if you can do it interactively. In situations where one partner is bothered if a line is missed, record the program so it can be backed up and replayed when needed. Keep this time relaxed and friendly. Concerns of the day or the family can be discussed as long as it is not automatically going to lead to conflict.

Take trips together as often as possible.

These do not have to always be extended vacations. At least one trip of a week or more should be planned per year. A few days away here and there will release some of the pressures of life and make the longer trip more productive for the relationship. If the longer trip has to be the family vacation, try to take some long weekends without the kids. You need this time together where raising and caring for your children is not the focus of your conversations and activities.

Have a meal alone together that is not a date.

If the timing is right, have breakfast after the kids are at school or day care. This may have to be a fifteen minute stop at a fast food restaurant. It may not seem like much, but this time together will accumulate if you stick with it. Many couples either work close enought to each other or have enough schedule flexibility to meet for lunch. Arranging for a lunch together one or more times per week can add hours per month back to the time a cusy couple can spend with each other.

Develop a mutual hobby.

The hobby itself may not allow an opportunity for bonding. However, it will give you and your partner plenty of conversation fodder for those times when you talk. Even taking the time to read the same book can make your couple time more productive. since one of the problems many busy couples face is a lack of common ground, this will pay dividends for date nights and meal times. Each partner will look forward t these together times with their great discussions.