5 Ways on How to Cope with Losing Someone to Suicide

It is never easy losing someone to suicide. The family member that chose suicide will never understand the pain that he or she has left behind for the rest of the family members life. Here are five ways on how to cope losing someone to suicide.

Accept That The Person Chose It

The hardest thing to accept it is that he or she chose it as a method of ending their life. They didn't care about how others felt. They didn't care about how many tears that they caused one to cry for several years. They didn't care about how every person in that family wishes that they could of said goodbye.

It is said that suicide is a selfish act. It's true. The person who chooses suicide's life is pain. The pain is unrelenting. The only relief that they get from the pain is when they sleep, then, when they wake, it's another sixteen hours or so of unrelenting and excruciating pain. The only solution is to sleep. They see that the only solution is to sleep and never wake up.

It's Normal To Feel Indirect Guilt

Please realize that it is normal to feel indirect guilt. We sit there in the back of our minds wondering what we could have done stop our loved one from committing suicide. Perhaps we feel indirectly responsible for that person going through with it. We go through emotions of anger, sadness, and happy memories of that person. The hardest thing is feeling indirect guilt for not stopping that person from walking out the door. You remember the last time that you saw that person and you fall apart wondering what you could of done to stop him from doing it.

Remember You Didn't Fail Them

It is easy to switch the blame on yourself or upon other family members. It is easy to feel that we failed that person over and over again that caused them to end their own life by suicide. Anger is a normal emotion to feel towards a family member for not doing something, saying something, and stopping them. The feeling of failure is a deep rooted feeling of putting blame upon yourself so strongly that you have a difficult time overcoming it.

Remember Money Wasn't The Answer

No amount of money on the face of the earth could of saved that person. You can tell yourself all day long that money would of made him stay around but it isn't true. Money is only temporary happiness that runs out once the money is gone. I use to have so much hatred toward someone in my family because I felt that he failed the person by not giving him money for a nice luxury apartment and hot top of the line computer. I felt that he didn't care about a ounce of breath since he did not hand over money to keep him alive. I was livid and that was wrong.

Remember It's Normal To Cry

Some people think that it is a sign of weakness to cry after they are informed that someone that they loved dearly chose suicide as a method to end it all. It is okay to cry. Tears are a normal human emotion. I was too scared to show tears in front of anyone else. I started to cry in a private place where nearly nobody heard me. I couldn't cope. I couldn't deal with it anymore. I just sat there crying my eyes out for several hours. I couldn't figure out the overwhelming emotions that I felt within me.

Many feel that the most difficult thing about losing a loved one to suicide is that the person who did it that you loved so much was so sad or depressed that they felt that suicide was the only way out.

You may find yourself going through a variety of different emotions. Anger and sadness often go back and fourth like a light switch from one minute to the next.