5 Ways to Prevent Toddler Biting

Remain calm! There are a number of children who go through a "biting" stage. I have seen it time and again, and although it may not appear so on the surface, it is usually something that can be dealt with successfully in a relatively short time. The first thing we must agree on is that biting is NOT acceptable behavior. Generally, a toddler bites when he is challenged. When someone else wants the toy he is using, or when he wants a toy someone else is using, he asserts himself. He bites and gets the desired result. Often, he bites because he doesn't have the words to communicate his desire effectively. His experience pushes past his ability to express himself. This can happen with siblings of different ages at home or in an early childhood facility with children his age. In the heat of play, the young child simply has not developed the vocabulary necessary to handle confrontation. It is our job, as parents and educators, to empower the active toddler with the necessary words to prevent unacceptable behavior. There are some things we can do to provide useful language tools and avoid the confrontations that may result in a bite.

* Always supervise toddler play. Watch for the behaviors that precede a bite. Accidents happen in a flash, so toddlers should always be closely supervised. If a confrontation occurs, remain calm, and offer the child the words he needs to diffuse the situation successfully.

* Provide a variety of age-appropriate play toys. Games and toys can be rotated occasionally to stimulate the child's curiosity and prevent boredom.

* Group activities like floor puzzles are good for building a sense of community or family.

* Music is great fun and always a good way to stimulate the toddler creatively. Whether is singing some songs or learning the "Hokey Pokey," toddlers respond to music.

* Awaken all 5 senses of the toddler with the use of creative experiences. Go for a "nature" walk. Collect leaves, or stones. Look for birds or different colored cars. Provide different textures of fabric to feel or different fragrant items to smell and identify. The object is to stimulate the senses. The greater the child's bank of experience, the more likely he will be to find an appropriate way to communicate his thoughts.

Remember to demonstrate the same technique with the child if he does bite. Remain calm and do not to over react. Use calm words to explain that his behavior is unacceptable, and express your displeasure with his behavior, but distinguish the behavior from the child. Remind him he is still loved. A "thinking place" (one minute X the child's age) affords the child the opportunity to consider his behavior.

A healthy 2 year old has a vocabulary of somewhere around 50 words which consists mostly of household terms and people. Some children experience what experts call a "word spurt" during the stage between 18 - 36 months. The stimulus that brings on this rapid increase in vocabulary is a generous exposure to both simple and complex words.

Here are a few tried and true methods to bring about this word spurt in your word hungry toddler

* There is indisputable evidence that reading often to our young people helps build their verbal skills. This includes easy and visual board books to more imaginative and complicated series, like the Chronicles of Narnia or Aesop's Fables. Visits to the local library can be exciting adventures for the toddler.

* We can offer the children "guided play" experiences based on books we read. This is helpful because their real life experience is limited. We play a game called, "Let's Pretend ..." We pretend to be pirates on a treasure hunt in the Caribbean. We pretend to be Pilgrims newly landed at Plymouth. We pretend to be grown ups sitting around the dinner table. Any number of scenarios can be offered to stimulate our child's creative thought and in the process, his vocabulary.

* Another way, interestingly enough, is to allow our toddlers to create their own language. When they are able to do this, they can then learn to interpret it for the parent or teacher. The use of imaginary friends is a similar ploy that allows the child to say things or express themselves in new and courageous ways.

As with all humans, communication is a vital key in the development of a toddler, particularly between 18 - 36 months, and as parents and educators, it is important to give our toddlers the words they need to avoid unacceptable behaviors such as biting. Lack of knowledge can be scary as well as frustrating, so be ready to offer a variety of positive word choices in any particular situation. Help your toddler conquer the urge to bite by helping him build a powerful vocabulary. It will serve him well throughout his life.