50 Little Known Facts About Nancy Pelosi *

With the recent change in the congressional balance of power, presumed Speaker of The House Nancy Pelosi has very much been in the news. Just who is this Nancy Pelosi who will soon lead our legislative branch? Here are some factoids that have been collected about Madame Speaker-Elect listed now for your consideration. If you didn't vote for her, too bad: it's too late to change your vote now.

1. Just to be clear: Nancy Pelosi fought Chuck Norris in a cage match and won handily six out of six rounds.

2. Nancy Pelosi votes in two ways: bitchin' and super-bitchin'

3. Nancy Pelosi can sing The Nationl Anthem in 4-part harmony all by herself

4. Nancy Pelosi is the sole author of The Washington Post

5. Nancy Pelosi can cast 265 votes per second

6. Nancy Pelosi can bench press Dennis Hastert

7. Nancy Pelosi regularly skips breakfast and feels no ill effects

8. Nancy Pelosi repelled down the capitol dome with Ted Kennedy strapped to her back - twice

9. Nancy Pelosi is Harold Ford, Jr's mother

10. Nancy Pelosi charges Mastercard 35% on cash advances

11. Nancy Pelosi created and executive produces Jerry Bruckheimer

12. Nancy Pelosi can turn Jimmy Carter into peanut butter by staring at him really hard

13. Nancy Pelosi was the director's first choice to play Magneto in The X-Men

14. Nancy Pelosi calls for a quorum with an alpine horn she fashioned out of Tom Delay's collar bone

15. Nancy Pelosi can darn 2000 socks a minute

16. Nancy Pelosi's favorite tv show is "The Nancy Pelosi Show"

17. Nancy Pelosi invented the pompadour

18. Nancy Pelosi kicked the Lincoln Memorial in the shin and it began to cry

19. We will colonize Mars because Nancy Pelosi says so

20. Nancy Pelosi invented Chinese

21. Nancy Pelosi has a chicken that lays fabrage eggs

22. The 50 stars on the American flag represent all the people Nancy Pelosi has intentionally maimed with numbchucks.

23. Nancy Pelosi was elected to represent California because she has the power to control earthquakes with her mind.

24. 87% of the books in the Library of Congress are about Nancy Pelosi

25. Trent Lott has a Betty Boop tatoo on his arm that Nancy Pelosi put there after she knocked him unconscious with a frozen
cat

26. Nancy Pelosi has a large collection of tatooing needles and frozen cats

27. Nancy Pelosi's had the coolest nickname at her high school: people called her Nancy Pelosi.

28. Nancy Pelosi stole Dr. McDreamy away from Meredith Grey

29. Nancy Pelosi can make sixteen gallons of orange juice with a single lemon.

30. The show MacGyver is based on the life of Nancy Pelosi

31. Nancy Pelosi's spy code name is John Murtha

32. Nancy Pelosi beat the Statue of Liberty at arm wrestling

33. Nancy Pelosi used a real whip when she was Minority whip

34. When Nancy Pelosi last ran for re-election, she broke a land speed record

35. Nancy Pelosi's ipod holds 42 trillion songs

36. There's a sandwich named for Nancy Pelosi- it consists of an entire bison, three wheels of cheese and Antonin Scalia's
head

37. Nancy Pelosi has been in office since she was 14 months old

38. Nancy Pelosi is allowed to choose deal AND no deal

39. Nancy Pelosi carved Teddy Roosevelt's head into Mount Rushmore over one weekend using a pencil sharpener and a
ball of tin foil.

40. Nancy Pelosi has had Charlie Gibson, Brian Williams, and Katie Couric

41. Most illegal aliens come to California to start a better life, and to vote for Nancy Pelosi

42. Nancy Pelosi wrote most of the songs on Nirvana's Nevermind album

43. If a giant army of laser-shooting robots ever attacked America, the only person who could save us is Nancy Pelosi

44. Nancy Pelosi got Bill O'Reilly to admit he spins stories to the right

45. The deliciosity of Nancy Pelosi's chocolate souffle is the only thing the Israelis and the Palestinians can agree on

46. Nancy Pelosi has won the Miss American pagent every year since 1978

47. Over three million kids dressed up as Nancy Pelosi last Halloween

48. Nancy Pelosi knows the formula for cold fusion, but is keeping it secret because the rest of humanity can handle it yet.

49. All of the characters on The Simpsons are voiced by Nancy Pelosi

50. Nancy Pelosi has a better pass completion record than Peyton Manning