6 Things Not to Talk About on a Date

When you are on a date with someone you are trying to impress there are various ways that you can screw up. Here are some conversation topics which will probably torpedo the evening and the relationship. This is written from the man's perspective but the advice applies to either party:

1. Your Ex and how you miss her. An excellent way to repel your date is to just drone on about how heartbroken you were when your last girlfriend dumped you and how much you long to have her back. Gaze wistfully into space as you recall how much you loved her and how you screwed up. This clearly signals two things - that you are a loser and that you are not really interested in the woman across the table.

2. Your problems. Let's face it; we all have problems. However, just because they are important to us does not make them good topics for conversation. Telling the woman you have just met about your rotten tooth, your unappreciative boss, your noisy neighbours, your bad luck with women, your dog's fleas or your long list of ailments and afflictions will not impress her.

3. Sport. She may politely feign an interest in sport but unless you know that it is true stay off the subject. A long diatribe about how the coach of your favourite football team is not using the right tactics is unlikely to engage her attention or make her want to meet you again.

4. How great you are. The funny thing is that although women like successful men, they do not like boastful men. Bragging about all your triumphs at work, at sport or with women is unlikely to go down well. Better to be modest and self-deprecating while letting your inner confidence and success shine through in other ways.

5. Cars and other electro-mechanical devices. Your car may be very important to you and its performance a matter of pride but chances are that she really is not that interested. Stay away from discussions about brake-horse-power and fuel consumption. Similarly avoid talking about the super features on your new computer, mobile phone, flat screen TV etc. This stuff is boring.

6. Offensive material. Do not try to impress her with off-colour jokes, gibes about other races, anti-religious comments, talk of your sexual prowess or other similar stuff. By all means tell some funny stories but nothing offensive - she may smile politely but if you have offended her she is not going to return your calls.

So what should you talk about? That is easy. Ask questions. Find out about her. Listen attentively. Talk about the things she is interested in. Pay her a compliment about great she looks. Smile, relax and be friendly. It is only a date and you are both meant to enjoy it.

Paul Sloane is the author of How to be a Brilliant Thinker. He speaks on creativity and innovation.

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