7 Steps to Being the Perfect Wife

Being the perfect wife is a never ending process that will not happen magically after you say "I do." Forget the fairytale, marriage is hard work. It takes determination, sacrifice, and a willingness to grow. Becoming the perfect wife will require that you start each day with the willingness to work on being the perfect wife and ending each day on the exact same note. The real kicker is that it's not about him. Being the perfect wife is all about you.

Here are a few steps to get you moving in the right direction:

1. Grandma was right. If you can't say anything nice then don't say anything at all. Nagging (or reminding over and over and over) will not get your husband to change. So if what you have to say is not good, positive, or uplifting then let it go.

2. Do it yourself. If the garbage really needs to go out and he hasn't done it, then do it yourself. But if you can wait then wait. Make sure you thank him when he does do it.

3. Stick to a plan. Make a list of things that YOU have to do and work out a time to do it in. Some people even call this a schedule! Don't kick yourself if you don't make it through your list; just roll it over to the next day. And always allow yourself flexibility. There are those days when the unexpected will happen and you just have to go with the flow.

4. Find out what your husband expects of you. I had my husband make me a list of what he wanted or needed me to do (have a family dinner, keep the clutter picked up, etc.). What he expected and I expected were completely different. We were able to come to some compromise and it's made my life much easier.

5. Clean your sink before you go to bed. You'll be amazed at how much better you feel getting up in the morning if there isn't a sink full of mess waiting for you.

6. Romance your husband. Send him love notes in his lunch (make his lunch for him). Pack the kids off to Grandma's and surprise your husband with a quiet evening for two. Remind him that he is important to you.

7. Don't bad mouth your husband to anyone. Take time every day to write one positive thing about your husband and use this in your conversations as well. The more you focus on the positives the less you will notice the negatives.

Becoming the perfect wife will not happen over night, no matter how many tips you find and use. There will be setbacks, slowdowns, and even slips that will make you think that it's not possible. The truth is, the journey is really the goal. The more you work on being the best wife you can be, the more you will be building a marriage that will last.