7 Things to Remember About Saying "I Love You"

If I were to guess, I would say you love your children. This truth is hard to deny, even when the path your two-year old leaves rivals a national disaster. You can love a child who is throwing a tantrum, or embarrassing you in public, as well as that same peaceful little angel taking a nap. Don't let this emotion go to waste. These three short words have the power to imprint warmth and security in a child's heart for a lifetime.

1. Remember to say it. The first thing to remember about saying "I love you" is to simply say it! You may love your child from the bottom of your heart, but never say the words. Do not be like the dad who says, "I said it once, when you were an infant."

2. "I love you" is a complete sentence. Adding qualifiers like, when, or if, or but, nearly voids the sentiment. "I love you when you clean your room." or " I love you, but the dishes better be put away." Just skip the qualifier and get right to the point rather than connect the two.

3. Practice. If you rarely heard the words growing up, or are flat out uncomfortable saying the phrase, practice. Listen to yourself say "I love you" without anyone around. Say it until you can utter it without reservation, then practice saying it to your child!

4. Write it down. Leave a little "love note" occasionally. Slip "I love you" under their pillow, or in their toy box. Even if they cannot read, you can share with them what it says when they find it.

5. No strings attached. Do not expect your child to say "I love you" back. Sure it is nice when that happens, but do not force the matter. Unconditional love is priceless, and much more memorable.

6. Privacy. Saying "I love you" when your tween is heading off to school is one thing, saying "I love you" at the door of the school, in front of all his classmates is just embarrassing. Honor their privacy and keep your sentiments private.

7. Start early. Build loving connections in your child's brain. Pathways are formed by repeated experiences. Help your child feel secure with your love early on and then do not stop.

Life gets busy and trials come, you do not know what is around the next bend. What you can do is give your children a secure foundation of love. Have you told your children, "I love you" today?