7 Tips for a Successful Homestay in Japan

Studying abroad in Japan is an exciting and sometimes frightening experience. Exciting, because you are traveling into the unknown, half a world away, where you will learn new customs and a new way of life. Frightening, for those exact same reasons. Many people opt for a homestay with a Japanese family while abroad. This can ease the transition, by supplying a home and familiar faces to return to every day. For those whose Japanese is at a low level, a homestay is a sure way to ensure that you will always have someone to talk to with whom you can practice Japanese. With a host family taking care of you, you can also alleviate fears you may have of not knowing what to buy at the supermarket, how to use the toilet or shower/bath, or how to board the train or subway. There are many things that can help a homestay with a Japanese family go smoothly, and here are seven tips from my personal experience.

1. Be Open-Minded and Willing to Learn

Perhaps the most important thing you can do is enter your homestay with an open mind. Your Japanese family will easily be able to tell whether you are coming in with an attitude of superiority or a willingness to learn new things that Japanese children know and take for granted. Do not be embarrassed when you are unable to use the toilet because of the dozens of buttons on the side panel and your little host sister shows you how. Remember, you are traveling to a far away country because of your interest in their culture, and your host family has likely chosen to become a host precisely because they are eager to teach others about their way of life. Show a genuine interest, and they will be glad to show you the real Japan in return.

2. Be Willing to Teach

While your host family will undoubtedly be happy to teach you all about living in Japan, they are also likely to be interested in your culture, as well. Many members of host families would like to practice their English, just as you hope to practice Japanese. This can be both a blessing and a curse. For those who speak little Japanese, a host parent or sibling who speaks English can be a great help. On the other hand, if you want to learn Japanese but are only spoken to in English, it can be frustrating. Usually schools coordinate homestays; when you first meet your host family, make sure the expectations for English and Japanese speech are clarified. Your host family will also likely want to hear about your hometown, family, history, favorite foods, etc.

3. Bring Souvenirs

It is customary and polite to bring a gift for your host family. The best gifts are things that are unique to your hometown, state, region, or country. Local foods are a great idea, provided they won't spoil during travel. Guide books with lots of pictures (remember, they probably won't speak English), calendars, or regional crafts are also great choices. They will probably want to see pictures of your home, family, friends, or pets. This will also afford you with great conversation starters. Ask to see their pictures, too.

4. Bring a Few Mementos from Home

It is inevitable that you will become homesick sometime during your stay. When that happens, it will be good to have a few familiar objects that can remind you of home. Your host family will probably give you your own room. Just make sure you ask before you re-decorate. If you will be staying more than a few months, you may with to bring posters, a pillow or a blanket, or even ship a lamp or some other favorite object from your room to your new house in Japan.

5. Be Honest About Food

Although it is true that you should generally be willing to try new foods, don't be shy when talking about food. For instance, if you are allergic to something, make sure your host parents know. If you are vegetarian, let them know that as well, but be aware that it will be difficult for your host family to accommodate you. Most sauces have fish in them, for example, and most Japanese eat small portions of meat on a regular or daily basis. In order to not put too much stress on your host mother, try to think of compromises. It would be best to ask her not to make special meals for you daily, but to let her know that you can eat the dishes that have no meat. Offer to make your own main dishes yourself, or cook for the whole family every so often. Even if you have no dietary restrictions, offering to cook can be a wonderful thing. It gives your host mother a break, brings you closer into the family, and allows you to showcase, perhaps, a dish from your own home that your host family may have never had before. A last word on food: give your honest opinions of your host mother's cooking. Be polite, by all means. But don't claim that you love a dish that you secretly hate just to be polite. In an effort to please you, your host mother just might make that dish a weekly meal.

6. Be Industrious and Offer to Help Out

In some host families, you will be asked to do a few chores, such as cleaning your room or doing the dishes every so often. My host parents asked me to walk their dogs with them, keep my room tidy, and rinse my dishes, while my host mother did everything else. I have some friends whose host mothers did everything, including their laundry and making them a bento lunch box every morning. Even if your host parents don't ask you specifically to do a chore, offer to help often. Even if you are refused, the fact that you offered to help will go a long way in family relations.

7. Always Ask First

Most host families will have no problem if you want to watch a movie, store food in the fridge, do laundry, etc. But it is always best to ask first. The electronics (including the microwave/toaster oven combo) have many buttons and all are labeled in Japanese. To be sure you know how to use such appliances properly, ask for a demonstration or explanation. In addition, ask about when the best time to shower or bathe is, and whether or not you should use the ofuro (bath tub) or just shower. Most families bathe in the evening, washing in the shower and then soaking in the ofuro for a while. Also be sure to ask before inviting friends over, and inform your parents if you are going to be out late so that they will not make extra food or worry about you. Many times having friends to visit will be fine, but your host parents will want to be informed so they can prepare the house.

In conclusion, studying abroad will be a mind-opening, expansive experience. I highly recommend staying with a host family, as this will allow you a personal, inside view into everyday Japanese life. Keeping in mind that you are stepping into another world and being open for whatever comes will help you to have a rewarding, memorable experience.

If you are still searching for a school in Japan, see my article, "Studying Japanese at the Yamasa Institute in Okazaki, Japan" for a review on one popular Japanese language institute at www.associatedcontent.com/article/528009/studying_japanese_at_the_yamasa_institute.html.