8 Bonding Tips for Dads-to-be

Finding out you are going to be a parent can be wonderful, terrifying, exciting, and nerve racking all at the same time. Like most things, men and women deal with this challenge differently. A woman builds a bond quickly while the baby is developing and growing inside her. Men are unable to build this bond and are often left feeling like outsiders. There are several things men can do to develop the bond between the child and father.

1. Attend as many doctor appointments as possible with the mother-to-be. There will be opportunities to hear the baby's heartbeat, long before you meet the little one.

2. Go to the ultrasound. This may seem like a given, but many men do not take the time to go and see their baby in the womb. This is the first chance you are given to see your child, take it.

3. Touch the mother's belly often. This offers two benefits. The mother gets affection, while you get to be close to her and your baby. For many women, there is nothing sexier while she is pregnant than to have her partner touch her belly.

4. Talk or sing to your child. If this feels weird, talk often to the mother-to-be. The baby will learn the sound of your voice.

5. Go baby shopping. Everyone knows most men hate shopping. However, it is one thing you can do to feel connected to this pregnancy and your future child. Pick out a nice outfit (code word for shirt & pants!) or something that fits your personality to dress your baby in after birth. If you want to go overboard and actually buy a crib, carseat, stroller, or diaper pail, go for it.

6. Set up the baby's room. Whether it is an entire room just for baby, or a corner of another room, take the time to set up the crib and gather all the baby's things into its designated area.

7. Let your partner tell you an interesting fact while she is reading her pregnancy books. This allows her an opportunity to "teach" you something and lets her know that you are interested in being involved. You could even join in the reading!

8. Help pack the hospital bags. This will give the mother a break so she will stress less. While some of these tips seem more toward bonding with your partner, just remember who is carrying your child! You will be at the birth of your child, right? That is when the true bonding may begin. Hold your child close. Talk to him. Change her diapers. If the child will be feed with a bottle, hold him and feed him at every opportunity. If the child will be nursed, assist the mother (when asked, or agreed to) with finding a good position. Hand her anything she needs. Volunteer to take care of the baby while your partner gets some needed rest. This will give you time to bond with your child without distractions. You can be goofy, without someone (that can talk) watching you! Added bonus, your partner will feel more rested and more appreciative of all your help. When the mom is happy, the baby is happy - most of the time!

Becoming a parent is a life changing experience. If you take the time to prepare yourself and try to bond with your child, it will be change for the better. Having a child will being out the best parts of you and your partner. Take advantage of every opportunity to be the best dad you can be. Pretty soon, you will hear "daddy" for the first time, and it will be worth every effort you made.