9/11 Proofs: The National Shame, Part I

The National Collector's Mint is one of the most despicable organizations to emerge from a country that is, perhaps, best known for its disgusting corporations and the vile, soul-sucking-extortionist mentality of those conglomerate's brass. This country is sadly my own, the once great United States of America, now just a splatter art rendering of The Great Society gone wrong. My words are by no means poetic; in fact, they rarely hold any water at all. These sentences of mine are like paper buckets in the middle of the Alamo. Please, sit back and relax while The National Collector's Mint proves my point for me. The following is a description of their new "product":

"The 5th Anniversary WTC Commemorative
Price: $29.95

This historic 2-piece memorial transforms into a magnificent standing sculpture of the Twin Towers, and is clad in 24 KT gold and .999 Pure Silver recovered from Ground Zero!This groundbreaking non-monetary issue will never be released for circulation. Now, it is available through this special private minting for collectors only!

This truly unique commemorative is created using two distinct struck pieces. First, a traditional round planchet is struck with frosted relief on a mirror-like background. Then, a magnificently engraved skyline featuring the Twin Towers is struck separately and fitted into the background. This World Trade Center skyline can be removed and inserted into a slot on the face of the commemorative. The effect is dazzling - it is literally transformed into a standing sculpture of the Twin Towers!

The World Trade Center skyline is lavishly clad in gleaming silver that was miraculously recovered from a bank vault found under tons of debris at Ground Zero. Now, to mark the fifth anniversary, the same silver that was reclaimed from the destruction has been used to cover the magnificent Twin Towers depicted in the 2001-2006 World Trade Center Commemorative. The stunning design of this magnificent September 11th memorial is a 15 mg. of 24 KT gold and 15 mg. of .999 pure silver clad tribute to all who were lost on that fateful day. $5 of every commemorative order is donated to official 9/11 family charities and memorials." -NationalColletorsMint.com

The dreadful reality and downright shamefulness of this scam is far too gross for me to actually comment on. I could dissect the moral corruption of this bargain death trinket all day, but that would be futile and maybe even embarrassingly tearful (under this tough guy persona, I am horribly sensitive). Instead, for starters, I think a pragmatic discourse on how the hell a private company procured this ignominious metal from a mysterious "bank vault found under tons of debris at Ground Zero" is in order.

How fucking vague is that? That is shady on a scale of preposterous proportions. Did some union dick, construction foreman "stumble" upon the vault like it was buried treasure; did he have a map with dotted lines and a big X on it?

I called The National Collectors Mint at their toll free customer service (crank calls can be directed to 1-800-452-4381 if you feel like waiting). After 20 minutes on hold, listening to dim renditions of some unfamiliar patriotic tunes, I gave up. My time is money and I was fairly certain that the person on the other end of the line wouldn't have answers to any of my three questions:

1.What bank was this silver procured from and how did The National Collectors Mint get their hands on it?

2.What particular 9/11 charities would be getting your donations?

3. Do you feel like this "deal" is exploiting the deaths of nearly 3,000 innocent Americans, or do you wish I would just leave you alone and let you do your job?

Perhaps I'll call again when it's not such a peak hour. I would hate to scathe a poor worker fellow or gal, mindlessly making a living by tracking orders and trying to be pleasant. The working class is my people and although I'm looking for truth, I would hate to ruin somebody's day.

Stay tuned for part II of this series. I'll have answers to at least two of those questions.