A Banner of Stars

I am taking out the trash and feeling kind of shabby. It is Friday night and I think everyone has a life but me. I have slipped into an old turquoise sweat suit like old women wear. In fact when I picked mine out at Walmart I had a conversation with two elderly ladies about the comfort of these highly affordable clothing units. I never wear mine outside of the house except for trips down the drive way to the trash and recycling bin or to the mailbox to see if my rent deposit has found its way to my new address. As I accidently spill my paper recyclables into the bottle and can section of the bin, I wonder if anyone cares. I don't plan to dive to the bottom of the bin to re-recycle the waste that has been pitched absentmindedly.

My mind wanders and I am taken back by the beauty of the early evening, the late February cold fading. I am outside barefoot against the cool concrete. The stars glimmer between the empty tree branches. They are works of art I hope to capture in an image for a poem or perhaps the beginning of a devotional. I am thinking about My Father. I am hoping He will speak to me as I begin my weekly fast.

The stars against the sky pierce the shabbiness I feel and I am taken into the beauty that rises up over head far into the unknown. I am like these tiny points of light lost among all the others scattered above me. I realize all of the sudden how clear they are, how little the light around me affects the view. I discover at this new house I now call home, I will be able to take in the night sky on a clear night without difficulty. I discover another aspect of living here that has been waiting for me to be revealed and enjoyed. It reminds me of God's goodness and provision. And I can't help feel joy rise within me as I head back inside to make a cup of tea and write.

I fast because we live in the unknown. Life is fragile and I cannot possible navigate it on my own. More and more I understand how my much I need the Father. More and more I see His faithfulness stretch over me like a banner. It is His signature written on my mind. His Word leaves His imprint on my soul. I am His workmanship created in Christ Jesus for good works. Ephesians 2:10 a

Another day follows, as I write my sister I share that even though my circumstances are still difficult there are little bits of encouragement along the way. This week I was accepted into an art show, two of my pieces of writing sold. My efforts to channel my creativity are slowly paying off and this encourages me. They become little points of light in my darkened sky.

As I work outside my house I discover spring has come to Texas in the daffodils that bloom in the front garden and white violets that have taken over the eastern side of my yard. Their fragile presence speaks to me as they are transformed to stars above my head.

He has taken me to the banquet hall,
and his banner over me is love.

Song of Solomon 2:4 (NIV)