A Daycare Provider's Top 11 Parent Peeves

If you have found a good daycare provider, don't let him or her go. Good daycare is hard to find, and if you do find it, you need to appreciate it. Be respectful and courteous to your daycare provider, and you are likely to keep them around for a long time. They are also more likely to appreciate you as a client. Here are a few simple mistakes you can avoid making that will go a long way in letting your daycare provider know you appreciate them.

1. Don't show up more than twenty minutes early or late without calling first. Your daycare provider may have things to do before/after drop-off/pick-up. She has a life. She may have wanted to finish vacuuming before you dropped your child off or entertain company twenty minutes after you were scheduled to pick your child up. She will appreciate a heads up if the time is going to change.

2. If you do show up early, don't be upset if the daycare provider isn't completely ready to receive your children. If she was sleeping, and needs to get dressed, do not be impatient. Likewise do not be upset if she is on her way home from somewhere. Again, she plans for you to come at the time you say you will come--not twenty or forty minutes before it. If you're early and don't call, it's your fault--not hers.

3. Don't routinely drop your kids off much earlier than or pick them up much later than you have to. Your daycare provider works hard to care for your child while you're at work. If it only takes you 15 minutes to drive to work, you don't need to drop them off an hour in advance--especially if that wasn't part of the original agreement. Don't take your time picking up. If you are rarely late, your daycare provider is much more likely to be understanding when you really have to be late than if you are always 15 minutes late. Likewise, if you drop off on time, your daycare provider will be more understanding when you do have to drop off early for whatever reason.

4. Don't expect your daycare provider to make special meals for your child. She has other children, maybe even of her own, that she needs to care for. Asking her to feed them specific things that take 15-20 minutes to make takes preparation and cleanup time that she could be using to care for the other children or be with her own children. It is much easier for her if preparation and cleanup are quick and simple--and if she can feed all of the kids something similar. If you do want your child to have special meals, make them yourself, and put them in a Tupperware box.

5. If your child is sick, let your daycare provider know prior to dropping the child off. There are other children in her home that she must protect from illness. It's best not to bring your child to daycare if they are sick. If you know your child is going to scream all day, because she has been all night for example, take the day off. Don't knowingly put your daycare provider through that.

6. If your schedule changes, tell your daycare provider as soon as you know. Of course there will always be last minute changes that cannot be helped, but if you find out a week in advance, it is not okay to tell your daycare provider the day before that you'll be working late the next day.

7. Keep your cell phone and work numbers current, and be reachable. If you won't be reachable, let her know. She needs to call you in case of an emergency for your child or one of the other children in her care. She may have a family emergency of her own or become sick. Any number of things could come up, so make yourself available to her. If you have one, give her your work email address, too.

8. Don't blame every diaper rash, bump, and bruise on your daycare provider. Remember that your child sleeps in a crib at night by himself, and he is also with you and other caretakers during the day. It is possible that he got a new bump on your watch or that the food you are feeding is responsible for the diaper rash. Your daycare provider is not a scapegoat, and she isn't perfect--just like you aren't. If you do confront her, do it gently and without accusing.

9. Even if your child is an angel, he will have bad days. Your daycare provider will, at some point, have to discipline him. Let her know how you want her to handle situations, and don't be upset with her if she handles them in the way you instruct her to do--only if she does something you haven't given her permission to do. Being in denial isn't going to help your child behave better. Likewise, if your daycare provider tells you your child needs to work on sharing or getting along with others, help out when you're at home or out and about with him, teaching him these behaviors.

10. Adjusting to being in a new daycare takes time for a child. It could be days before your child is acting normal, even weeks. Moreover, it takes time for the daycare provider and other children to adapt to having another child around. Give it time. This is also true of leaving. When you leave, your child, the daycare provider, and the other kids have to adjust to the change. If you do decide to switch daycare providers, give a 2 week notice so the daycare provider can prepare herself emotionally and financially, begin finding a replacement, and start preparing the kids for the change. It is extremely rude to just say, at the end of the week, "By the way, I found someone cheaper and closer to home. I won't be seeing you anymore."

11. Don't drop off and pick up your kid and immediately walk away. Stay and chat for at least a few minutes. It is important to have a healthy relationship with your daycare provider and stay in touch with her on some level. She may have something to tell you or discuss with you. While talking you may discover there is something you need to tell her. Make time, at least occasionally, to discuss how your child is doing--even if its just for five minutes. Don't, however, expect her undivided attention when she has other little ones, and don't hang around for more than 10 minutes jawing her ear off. She has to get back to work!

Some of this may be inconvenient for you, but try to do it anyway. If you can't help something, don't fret over it; just explain. You need to have a good relationship with your daycare provider. She is, after all, looking after your child while you work. Following these simple guidelines can make your working relationship much more pleasant. It will also make her less stressed out, so she can provide better care to your little darling.