A Feminine Feminist

It was 10 o'clock at night on Sunday, I was relaxing with my boyfriend watching a movie in the dark, when he got up to use the bathroom. When he turned the bathroom light on, a little bug, which had come out to play in the dark, shot across the floor and went back into his hiding spot. My boyfriend screamed, slammed the bathroom door, and retreated back into the living room as if the creature from the black lagoon himself was hiding in the bathroom.

As an advocate of equal rights for men and women, I have always made an effort to avoid phrases such as "stop being a girl" or "be a man", but at this moment all I wanted to do was tell him to suck it up, go back in there, kill the bug, and come back out as my victorious hero! (And a passionate kiss after all that wouldn't hurt!) Instead I put on my slippers, went in the bathroom, scooped up the little big in a tissue and threw him out the window.

I sat depressingly back down in the couch to finish the movie. But I couldn't stop wondering... Could I call myself a feminist and still want my boyfriend to kill the bug? I began to examine my life. I proclaimed that I was a strong and independent woman, yet still preferred a man who knew how to use power tools. I constantly say men and women are equal, yet I thoroughly enjoy being treated with "like a lady". So where does a strong, opinionated, independent woman, who still liked to be treated "like a lady" belong?

Women around the world are repressed and have been since the beginning of time. I am lucky that I have gone to college, make more money than most men my age, and am able to live freely and independently. So part of me feels a little wrong wanting a man to do all the hard, dirty jobs for me. But the other part of me still longs to be swept off her free by her hero (even if the heroic effort is only killing a bug or changing a tire).

For me, knowing that I can kill the bug, that I know how to change a tire, and that I am alright alone is enough for me. I don't need to go prove it, and so I feel justified wanting to be treated "like a lady" and still calling myself a feminist.