A Few Things You Might Not Have Been Told About Being Married with Offspring

Selective Humor and Wit, Not Always a Good Thing

Cas
Many men realize it, some women plan it. Marriage, for a lot, the vows never go forgotten, for the rest of the time is filled with diaper changing, potty training, sarcastic remarks from time to time, and well, an occasional foul word out of the mouths of the offspring that leave time for sheer amazement of audaciaty. Education is not a preparing fix all for circumstances, or even circumstance. Prepare yourself, because educatrion, very well may be the new binge and purge for those of you who understand everything to be by the book, and think education solves everything, because no matter how much you read up, and think you know and show with your pampered degree of luxury and know how, every child is different, and they do not come with anything other than uniqueness. Don't let the milestone charts, and lump sum categorization fool you, personality might be precious, but it isn't going to change busy body day care workers, and those who try to diagnose developmental delays from crawling up your tree in your crook of the nook with a high powered spectacle because menopause hit them and they never had a kid or a marriage of their own and couldn't decide to adopt, or didn't adopt, or didn't wed. Or, merely because they too are sick of having to critique and diagnose a precieved requirement in a supposed timeline of when one is supposed to mention and draw, among other things. Forget the deposit, and spankings do not solve everything. Enjoy the inqusitive, humorous, and retorts of a manner unexpected. Tempers are going to flare, and dirt, it could hurt, I personally found yoga to be my solution, I got a doctors premission, get your own before trying yoga.

Yes, the regression snap, isn't only for children, you too will be eyeing your toes differently, trying to gum things and crawling will be the new sport of luxury. You will possibly even wind up throwing food too, in restraunts in no time. Let it out if you need to, because if you bottle it up, you're gonna wind up signing a whole new piece of paper. Remember how nice it was to be clean and have a new suit or even t-shirt that stayed clean all day, forget about it. It'll dry clean, wash out or it won't, and sometimes things just won't wash out of even the darkest t-shirt. I didn't think it was possible to need a new broom, dish towel, mop, or wash rags, scrub brushes, teflon skillet or spatula, yes it's possible, and honestly, it takes a young child and mechanic husband to make the mess and I wear these things out, slowly. I am happy, and things are decent around here. You will go through carpets, couches, chairs get messed up too, prepare yourself, and scolding a 2-4 year old for spilling or making an accidental mess, isn't going to make the messes stop. I honestly do not understand how mothers do not loose the weight after child birth.

Then you will deal with teachers, friends of your child and their parents, possibly principals and law enforcement or social workers. Yes even bright, shiny, rich, well off, nice neighborhood home owner's children can cause problems, and even for your low income child who is trying to do the best for themself and their family. Expect income to be judged, intelligence to be evaluated and attire to be reasoning for school yard hassles. Children can get along, it's parental judgement of another, of value in terms of moral and character, not finances, that helps solve friendship issues amongst some children, sometimes. Prepare yourself, for gulie behavior, you might have to show some yourself and this one takes the cake and smears it, don't ever mention to your child how much money you have in the bank, or show them your paycheck or bank records, lock it up out of their sight. If fights are starting at school over financial issues. Try this, just pay the price and rent a small apartment or trailor, for a little while, six months to a year or even three years, isn't that long, you can find all bills paid, and they should shape up, and see both sides to a story. If your child is bullying others because they do not live in a standered of luxury, start taking public transit, hey, it's a reason, or buy a car that dosen't look so good, and also take public transit. They will notice diversity of a sort, like no other, that people can be happy, and enjoy what they do have and do well for themselves. Sometimes routines have to be broken. If your child is being bullied, principals don't listen, instead look at you with the what are you doing in my office again glare, as if you were a student and teachers look at you like they are fixing to start a case with the protective services division, just buy walking in the classroom, and you might have a disfigurment they do not understand, your child has an accent and/or disability, and on top of it you had a tattoo show, and they are predjudiced to automatically, and you cannot deal with the disrespect, save now, hire a lawyer to attend such mettings with you and your child. You might have to. There are attorneys that work just for children. There are all kinds of ignoramuses with check books and good credit trying to sick protective services on people, thinking that is enough reason to call on families and get away with it. The law will and does handle, bogus calls to such a division. When your child comes home talking about how they dislike a teacher, and/or a student, and a protective service division person comes knocking on your door, later, you deal with it and all goes ok, and all of a sudden your child says there was to be a substitute teacher for the rest of the school year, and the one teacher they didn't like was no longer working there. Don't put bogus calls past teachers or principals either. When your child says that they dislike a teacher, or principal, listen and do not pass it off as being spoiled not wanting to do homework, go up to the school and request a meeting. That is something low income and those of a higher tax bracket can both agree on. Just, the lower income seem to do it more often, make that appointment. Don't be scared of the public service programs, low income kids enjoy, it's ok to get your rich kid involved too, their part of the public, and you pay taxes. Intregate yourself. It's not just based on a need, and you have to want to go there. Or try going to different churches around town, or both.

The J.O.P. can do for you what a grandoise wedding extravaganza might delay, or prevent. It's simple, you have only two prying, meddling, or uncomfortable, required witneses, a legal requirement, a simple set of signitures and a legal one added to it. iInstead of a bunch of guests who really do not give a darn about anything other than the invitation, refreshments and traffic. Everyone usually tries to stay out of other people's weddings. I for one do not like to be invasive. Then you leave the office and go on about your business. Simple, not too pricey. Straight to the roomservice. Off to the new abode, and happily ever after. Ever dawn on anyone else diamonds are for the 50th or 60th anniversary? Buy what you want, when you want, if you can, there are plenty of repituable jewlers you can do business with. The next several decades, are going to age you before you know it, and it's not a bad way to go golden and prepare for the best years of your life, and not because of the final answer either, loving yourself is simple, sharing the love you have for yourself with another, that's the hard part, and why many women and men feel the need to go extravagant.

Supposing you have already met the in-laws and the arrangements have already been made in terms of time distance, and when, where and how to stay sane while dealing with them. Simple remedies for a long visit you'd like to be a bit shorter. Cook, the kitchen, by that I mean your kitchen, is your friend. The more time you spend cooking, cleaning and the less entertaining you do in terms of serving and conversation, the less time you have to deal with the privacy intrusion. Don't interrupt the visits with a need to do the channel changing, internet surfing, game watching, movie choosing, or comment making. If you live in a smal place, and you find the crowd to become a bit intrusive and have a need to get foul mouthed and toss them all the h-e-l-l out, the habanero pepper is your friend., and so is the jalepeno. As long as it is safe for you to eat, and you can do so without allergen, or reaction of an ill nature, eat one or however many you can safely consume, until the guests leave, or until you can refrain from saying what you really think, and mentioning what you'd really like to say and do. Also, send them all home with spicy left overs, so you don't over eat, if you can afford to do so, and possibly because the husband or wife thought the meal sucked and that there was too much whatever in it. Slowly increase the spice for the adults and eventually they will think the food is too hot and quit coming over for free food and conversation. Holiday's don't have to be all about money and food, they can be about cards and plane tickets. If you have the money, you can send the in law's a plane ticket to another country they have always wanted to go to, or cruise ship ticket. Then mention something about how attendance is not plausiable for you, or your taking another flight and missed it. All humor aside.. Plenty of ways to do things.

The spouse you married, he/she, they are still in there, haven't changed, and that child is going to grow up. Those friends of his, might not always be there for you or him. Her friends, will eventually go home, and possibly go on a cruise and take a haitus for a long time, and you might never see those friends again. In-laws can go away for vast extended time periods, but are almost gaurenteed to pop back up. You both will however have a legal binding document, that should in itself, by reading, re-reading, glancing or remembering, mentioning or thinking about it, should help end arguments.

Published by Cas

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