A Few Ways to Demolish Worry

Pinpoint the worrying thought: Worrying thoughts are often the result of half-formed ideas chasing each other around in your mind. This vicious circle can be broken by identifying and airing the worrying thought. Write down your top five worrying thoughts. Bringing them out into the open relieves the pressure.

Look at the evidence: what is the evidence? Instead of assuming that your thought is true, examine the actual evidence. Write down on a sheet of paper the evidence for both sides of the argument. What is the probability that your thought is correct? Rate the thought on a percentage scale (0-100%) in terms of how much you actually now believe it. For example, 'I am useless at this job'...believability=30%.

Explore the worst possible outcome: what is the worst thing that can happen? Fantasy is usually worse than reality. Imagine walking into a dark deep cave. You might feel frightened because you would not be able to see what is stretching ahead of you. Then imagine turning on a powerful torch which shines on the walls, showing the limits of the cave. More often than not our fantasies are much worse than a clearly identified worst option. Once we have placed limits on our worries, by identifying the worst possible outcome, they are easier to deal with.

Put yourself in somebody else's shoes: what alternative views are there? How would someone else view this situation? Think of two or three significant people in your life and imagine how they would view this situation? Talk to yourself out loud. What advice would they give?

Cost-benefit analysis: what is the effect of thinking the way I do? Ask yourself. How will holding this thought help me and how will it hurt me? List the advantages and disadvantages of holding a particular negative thought.

Think in shades of grey: am I thinking in all or nothing terms, or seeing things in a black or white fashion? Are you thinking of yourself as either 'a total success', or 'a total failure'. This common style of distorted thinking misses out on the middle ground, the grey area between the black and white. Remind yourself that things are usually somewhere between 0% and 100%, and rate where your negative thought is on the scale.

Box your worries in: if you are constantly plagued by worrying, set aside a specific time of twenty minutes as 'dedicated worry time'. Tackle each worry as a problem to think hard about and solve. If you find yourself worrying at other times during the day, postpone that worry until the allotted time.