A Few Ways to Make it in This Economy

Let's face it, economic times are tough. As the saying goes, though, when the going gets tough, the tough get going. With so many feeling the pinch, some more severely than others, many are scouring every nook and cranny for ways to make fast cash. Every day, it seems, I open my email inbox to payment processing jobs from princes in Indonesia or marketing firms based in Greenland. Before you go for that ludicrous job that pays $6,000 a month for only three hours of work a day, take a look at my list of creative ways to scare up some extra cash. A word of caution before beginning: this list is purely for entertainment purposes. I would not recommend actually putting any of these plans into action for obvious reasons.

A few years ago, it seemed like everybody on the block was remodeling their kitchen, the master suite, and their garage. Everyone, that was, but you. Those attractive home equity loans have all but dried up in the current "credit crunch" we hear so much about. What this means is you will have to keep pretending those laminate countertops, the ones that are grey with black and white flecks in them, are actual granite.

There is a way to pay out of pocket for that remodeling job, however. With properties for sale in abundance, why not jump into the wild world of real estate and become a slum lord? Now, before you pull back in revulsion let me explain. Slum lording really is not all that bad, really. All you do is take a property, charge a "fair market value" for it, and then do almost absolutely nothing as far as repairs and maintenance. Oh, of course you have to make the places livable, but that is such a relative term. If your tenants complain the appliances do not work worth diddle, tell them in more or less terms the tenants do not know how to use them properly. If the plumbing leaks, whatever you do, do not buy expensive replacement parts. It is much easier and cheaper to simply "tighten up" everything and ignore further leaks.

Now, to be honest, there will be tenants who will complain. In order for this to work right, fortunately there is a strategy when dealing with the picky types. If you have to cut into a wall, say to fix something electrical, claim you will be back later to patch up the wall. Keep putting it off time and time again until the tenants give up. Always be grumpy when you come over to repair anything. Make sure you leave discarded pieces of tape, sawdust, and other debris on the floor after you finish a job. Following these simple steps will ensure your tenants stop pestering you with repair problems. With repairs and other costly activities out of the way, you will be left to collect the rents and plan that dream kitchen.

Has your grocery money or utilities got you in a pinch? Perhaps sperm donation for you or your loved one would foot the bill. The process is relatively painless and would not disrupt a busy schedule. Depending on where you donate, you could stand to gain a fair amount of cash, all with only a few after effects. As you explore the option, though, you may want to disregard the possibility of a large pool of prodigy tracking you down in the future. You will definitely need to warn your kids that there could be dozens of people closely related to them, that they at all costs must not marry or have any children with. These slight inconveniences, however, greatly outweigh the short-term gain to be had from sperm donation.

With gas prices back on the rise and budgets stretched to the max, many are trying to find ways to stretch those mpg's. Let's face it, though, hybrids are expensive. What to do if you have a gas guzzler you just cannot unload? What if even your compact's fuel consumption still is crimping your wallet? Scrap metal is a hot market right now. With the high value of parts such as catalytic converters, thieves have gotten into the practice of chopping and selling the parts for a healthy profit. Why not beat them to the punch and sell those metal parts yourself?

Modern cars seem to be clad in a lot of plastic and fiberglass these days. Underneath all of that, though, there still is some metal present. Simply get under that car of yours, find a piece of metal, pull out the blow torch, and viola! With cash in your hand your gas cost woes have ended. Of course, this may cause a problem for you later when it comes to inspection time, but such problems can be addressed then, right?

These are only a few ways to combat tough economic times. I'm sure all of you could come up with your own creative ways, but I just wanted to share a few tips to entertain and get those wheels in your brain turning.