A Leprecaun's Contribution to St. Patrick Day"s Activities

It must be scary being Irish for so much is expected of you. You came up from being potato farmers and built a country that could make President's of you. How nice of the Irish to have their famous brawls and yet always manage to land on their feet and all. It must be very scary to be Irish and to have everyone looking up to you.

And looking up and seeing lace curtains in your kitchens and lace doilies under your treats is a hard thing to live up to and I for one think it must be very hard being Irish and having everyone looking up to you. What if your neighbors were jealous of your lace and all ? Would they make you feel uncomfortable and wishing you weren't so swell? It must be very hard being Irish and having everyone looking up to you.

It must be hard being Irish and being so religious and all. Such strife between the Catholic and the Protestant rivals Israel and all those other states that don't want to convert to us. It must be very important being Irish and leading the call back to the real issues of who is God and who is not. It must be very hard being Irish and having everyone looking up to you.

And oftentimes when Irish make friends with those who are not it's like crossing cultures and some such cause. My friend was Irish and quite a lady, I might add. But she had a twinkle in her eye and she knew more about me than me and that sometimes made her sad, although she never said why. It must be hard being Irish and living off your land having to be sociable with those whose paths you cross.

Being Irish, I would like to throw an Irish ball. I would offer green champagne in leprecaun decanters. I know for sure I would have tons of fries all corkscrewy and topped with bacon and cheese. I know I would have that and lots of it too. My salad would be peaches and bing cherries and laced with liquer of absinthe and just
a touch of clove maybe a whole one for each guest. I know I would have strip steaks and a fiesty cook. His hat wouldn't be at all like a leprecauns and tied in the back. I know I would have an Irish band of nine banjos and and nine fiddlers too. I know I would throw a rainbow or two and make the guests find the golden rule.

And the rule would be a pot of honey and three coins in the bottom which the winner wouldn't keep cause a wily leprecaun would be close by and snatch it back as soon as found and hi tail it out of town. It must be hard to be an Irish person and not living in Ireland at all. Might make you wish you were in Iceland what with everybody's temper and all.