A Look at "Real Weddings"

Anyone who has recently married knows that the cost of weddings is outrageous. According to a survey cited on cnn.com, the average wedding in 2005 cost $26,327. That's enough for a down payment on a house, or to buy a brand new car, or could help with that dreaded retirement savings. Instead of using this money to get out of debt, we use this money to impress and entertain our friends as extravagantly as we can because it is what is expected of us.

And who really wants to have an "average" wedding anyways? Do you really want to spend $26,000 on an "average" wedding that anyone can throw? I don't think so. But how much more do you have to spend to have an above average wedding? Will an extra $10,000 or $20,000 cut it? And what about saving for that first home or retirement? Where does that fit in to the plan?

The media doesn't help things at all. Wedding magazines and web pages describe "perfect" weddings in great detail. These are called "Real Weddings" because they are supposedly weddings put on by everyday people like you and me. A "Real Weddings" story would read something like this: "It's a beautiful, sunny day in Rhode Island, a 'perfect' day for Ashley and Kenneth's wedding at the Wilmington Estate. The smiling bride, dressed in the 'perfect' Vera Wang dress, walks hand-in-hand with her groom into the 'perfect' solarium, outfitted with dozens and dozens of pink roses and candles. The guests dine on a 'perfect' combination of filet mignon and shrimp, while sipping on the couples' signature drink - mango martinis. Their seven-layer wedding cake is divine, the homemade sugar box favors are monogrammed with each guest's name, and everyone dances until 2am to the 'perfect' band. The couple strides off in a vintage car as they head to the 'perfect' honeymoon in Fiji."

The only thing real about these "real" weddings as described in these magazines is that you "really" can't afford it. The tent rental alone for these weddings can cost $20,000! That's right - $20,000 for a tent that you don't get to keep. The magazines, however, portray these to be "real" weddings - the kind of wedding that folks just like you have. No wonder "real" weddings are so expensive today - social expectations mandate that you make your wedding as close to one of these "real" weddings as you can, benefiting the wedding industry and all others who make these "real" weddings the ideal.