A Man's Guide to the Perfect Valentine's Day

We all know that Valentine's Day is one of the most romantic Holidays of the year! Anyone who is alive and breathing can attest to the fact that it means love, romance, candy, hugs and kisses, and greeting cards! But for most of us men it means a day filled with trepidation, anxiety and fear! A day we regret the very reasons we're together with our spouse! Most of all it means living with the knowledge that no matter what gift, flowers or candy "it won't be right"! For years I have personally tried to solve this dilemma and here's what I've come up with. This is a simple guide to get you through this dreadful day with a minimum amount of harm and, possible enjoy the day.

PLANNING

Planning the day is key. Most men don't do this very well and, as a result, we are sure to fail! When we look at the "Do's and Do not's" of Valentine's Day it will become clear how this affects the outcome.

PREPERATION

Prepare everything down to the last detail! There is nothing that can be done if you have planned your event, executed all of the details but not prepared for disaster! Again, in the "Do's and Do not's" you will realize the importance of a "plan b" and, in most cases, a "plan c"!

What's important to remember is that Valentine's Day is a celebration and a reiteration of how much you love your spouse. For me this is simple. And this leads us to our first "Do"

The DO's

1. Pay attention to your spouse! All year long is the time to start this activity! You will never be wrong if you know your spouse. Pay attention to her and what she likes as well as her dislikes! Take a look in the medicine cabinet once in a while to see what's she's wearing. Notice her hair, her scent, indeed; study her like an NFL playbook! Learn her moves better than you know the moves of your favorite NFL player. Most of us can quote Bret Favre's statistics between 1998 and 2008 yet few of us even know what type of perfume our spouse wears!

2. Start with flowers! If your spouse works then have them sent to her job. The flowers are important because they show others what she already knows! "You're a great guy"! Woman love the attention they get from their spouse but they also love the attention they get from other women! It gives them a chance to declare ownership of a great guy in public. It's a lot like your favorite team winning the Super Bowl and you declare in a bar that "That's my team"!

3. Plan the perfect meal. If you don't get it by now let me reiterate that this day is about the attention you give to her! A perfect meal says even more about what you know about her! Let's face it, the idea of a heart shaped pizza doesn't work! Not because the "heart shape" is romantic but because pizza isn't romantic! Plan on cooking a meal for two with your favorite drink and a special dessert afterwards. Check online well in advance for a favorite recipe and rehearse. Remember, If you get the opportunity to take her to a favorite restaurant you might need reservations. Cooking at home would be your failsafe, your "plan b" in the event you didn't plan ahead and make these reservations.

4. Since you took the time to learn about your spouse tell her! Not that you, "took the time to learn about her" but tell her in your words how much you love her. Tell her how much you appreciate everything she is, does and the way she makes you feel! Write a few lines on nice paper about the size of an index card. Place it in the envelope with that wonderful card that you got for her! You did remember a card, right?

5. Be sure to get a small gift. In fact, several small gifts leading up to the day builds the anticipation of your spouse. This is one of those times when buying the big screen HDTV is not a good idea! As men (and children) we tend to think it's a good idea to get something WE like in the event the spouse hates it! That way we can say "well I bought it for you" and that makes it OK to keep! Wrong! Diamonds earrings are less than 100 bucks! Perfume, a purse etc. Items that she likes! More importantly, items that are personal! Remember, it's all about romance!

The "DO NOT's"

1. Just one "Do Not!" Don't wait until the last minutes for any of the above. Planning and preparation are important! If you don't want to be left out in the cold with no flowers, no reservations and "plan b" make sure to start early! For the flowers allow extra time for lost delivery drivers. For reservations for dinner remember that there are lots of other men with the same idea for the same restaurant! Do it early!

As for me and my wife? Here's my plan! She wins for a few reasons. I love to cook and, in the Chicago land area, I usually go to a place called "Trader Joe's". They have the best values in prepared dinners for two that require a minimum of preparation. Already strategically placed in our freezer is "Chilies seasoned Tilapia for two! Just a few minutes in the microwave to thaw and then into the oven! Less than an hour later I have the perfect meal. Also at "Trader Joe's" is the best selection of bouquets. This is my "PLAN B" in the event the flowers that I've already arranged to send get pushed off track for whatever reason. Here favorite perfume was a little tough since she wears something so unique that it can only be found in a few local places. My solution was to place the order online and have it delivered to my workplace to maintain the element of surprise.

I can't stress enough the importance of knowing your spouse and planning for this very big day! Keeping in mind these two things alone will ensure a very happy Valentines's Day!