A Mother's Guilt: How to Love Your Kids While Living Your Life

It is the age old battle of whether to stay home and bond with your baby or go to work and help provide for your family. Either way society leaves us mothers feeling guilty one way or another. Whatever choice you make know that it is the one that is right for you and your family; after all, we are the ones that eventually make it work for our families.

If you are a stay at home mom there are several resources available that can help you form that closer bond with your child.

Play days.

On nice days, spend some time with your child at the park. There are maps of parks in your area online at http://www.mapquest.com. If it is just the two of you enjoy the one on one time, but if you find yourself amongst other SAHM's enjoy the get together and opportunity for your child to socialize with other children . You may just form friendships that can lead to more play dates and more opportunities for you to get together with people who have common interests. Having people to talk to who are going through the same struggles as you, and at times the same stages your child may be going through is invaluable.

Mommy and me.

If you have more than one child, make it a point to chose a day for just you and your child to spend together. It doesn't have to be anything spectacular, they will enjoy having you all to themselves. I went with my 8 year old to help him spend his birthday money. He had a little money left over after his purchases so he bought us a pretzel and a slushie. I felt special and it renewed that feeling of falling in love with the little guy. He has such a good heart and as he sat beside me, he snuck his arm around me and we sat sharing our treat in each other's embrace. He is my youngest, our "date" will be a cherished memory for years to come.

Arts and crafts.

If you have access to the internet there are endless amounts of activites that you can do with your child to help prepare them for preschool or kindergarten. One of the sites I frequently visited was http://www.kaboose.com. It has a lot of crafts that to do together as well as activities and ideas for family fun. http://www.coloringpages.net was another great website with fun ideas and a variety of coloring pages. A favorite for all ages and even the young at heart .... http://www.highlightkids.com. I still enjoy doing the hidden pictures!

If you do make the choice to work outside your home you will have to get creative in finding the time to do things with your kids. Quality time spent is more important than the number of times you spend with them. So make the most of your times together and you will find yourself less likely to feel guilty for being the working mom.

Weekend getaways.

Planning a weekend getaway can be inexpensive and not require too much time to plan. It can be spent visiting family and friends on an outing that the kids will enjoy, visit a zoo, spend some time at a water park, or go sightseeing in your area. You can even involve the kids in deciding what you are going to do and where.

One on one time.

Your child will appreciate getting to be with you alone, and if you work long hours he knows better than anyone how precious your time is. How special it will be for them knowing that you chose to spend time with them over any other thing. Plan an activity to commemorate the day so he will have tangible proof that you do think of him often. Maybe even make 2 so you can have one for yourself to take to work.

Make it a family event.

Sometimes just being together is key. I enjoy when my children volunteer to help me make supper. It gives us time to connect and find out what is going on in each other's lives. Then once supper is ready the conversation carries on into supper. I love hearing how they are doing and they are just as interested in what's been going on with me. Of course you have to be careful with these kind of moments...I have found out the hard way that they will not be as enthusiastic about family cleaning, darn.

Whatever you choose to do to connect with your kids, it should keep you from having any kind of guilt for taking the path you choose. We all get busy, but we love our families and ultimately we are doing what we feel is right by them.