A Night to Remember Those Lost to Suicide

Nationally someone dies every 16 minutes by suicide, the victims crossing all socio-economic boundaries. Delaware County averages 60 deaths by suicide every year, with a large spike to 91 in 2007.

On September 10, 2009, the 8th annual Candlelight Memorial to remember those lost to suicide.will be held. The event, run by Linda Falasco, will take place at the Amphitheater in Rose Tree Park, Upper Providence, Pennsylvania, beginning at 7:30 pm.

There wasn't always a place where survivors could come together to memorialize loved ones they lost to suicide. This is why Linda Falasco conceived the vigil, "So there would be a place for survivors to gather to remember their loved ones without feeling the shame and stigma of this type of loss." The night coincides with Worldwide Suicide Awareness Day and Suicide Awareness Week In Delaware County.

Last year there were over 250 people attending, many returning yearly after finding this a time of comfort. A number also volunteer, giving them a feeling of belonging through their participation.

Everyone is given a balloon to release in memory of those lost. When the balloons are released, the sky above the Amphitheater is filled with purple and turquoise. The number of balloons gives one the visual count of how many people locally are affected by suicide. The release allows some to let go of their hurt and pain.

The MaryEllen Carpenter Appreciation Award is presented to a survivor recognizing their work in the field of suicide awareness, prevention and postvention. Previous recipients have included Fredrick Hellman, Delaware County Medical Examiner, Dr. Howard Sudak, and Tony Salvatore, author and researcher in suicide prevention and postvention.

The roll call of names for those lost to suicide is the most emotional part of the night. Several survivors volunteer to read the names on the list, with more being added each year. On loan is a bell from the 9/11 Foundation, which is rung as each name is read. As the bell echos each time, all have time to reflect on another loss.

Everyone is given a candle to hold during the reading, giving a comforting glow to the night. Many people let the candles burn themselves out, not wanting to extinguish them too early, keeping their loved ones memory alive and bright.

The night is filled with special music, some written and performed by survivors. Many feelings and emotions are embodied in the music, the lyrics showing the pain of those that have lost someone.

This is a very special time for all those involved. Finding somewhere to go or someplace to attend as a survivor and feel as if one belongs is difficult. The Candlelight Memorial draws all together, lets their pain ease, if only for one night, and feel as if they are not outsiders.

If you or someone you know has lost a loved one to suicide, this is a wonderful event to attend. Pass the word and help with the continued success of this night.