A Parent's View of Reality Television

I just finished reading Timothy Sexton's article, How Reality TV Shows Have Dehumanized Society, on his views on "reality" television, with which I wholeheartedly agree, and would definitely recommend. I, however, wish to address the topic from a slightly different point of view. My concern about reality television is not only that it is dehumanizing, as Mr. Sexton so accurately described, but also that the effects are even worse because of what messages it teaches our children. Our society has become one of instant gratification and self indulgence, and reality shows illustrate the worst of these examples. Backstabbing, lying, ganging up on others, degrading oneself and /or others to get what one wants is the order of the day. What exactly are our children learning from television today?

Once upon a time, many television shows had messages. Shows like "The Brady Bunch", "Leave It to Beaver", "Father Knows Best", "Eight Is Enough", all depicted family life in a functional manner. I will not argue that many of us did not experience the somewhat unrealistic harmony of these programs, but it was a goal that was seen as healthy. Family values, like honesty, teamwork, fair play and responsibility prevailed in these shows. In the movies, the good guys usually won and the bad guys usually lost. And while this pattern may have been monotonous and unrealistic at times, there was a lesson in values that children took with them as they grew.

Today, developing minds watch a variety of "reality" shows with very little understanding that there is very little reality in what is actually served up to the public. With a weeks worth of footage-that's 168 hours-edited down to about forty minutes once you take the time out for commercials, there's a lot of opportunity for the editors to mislead the public purely by choosing scenes and putting them together out of context. My point: The creators and editors of these programs are very much so in control what the audience takes from their shows. And what the developing minds of the younger audiences take from these shows is unsettling.

No longer is the hero or survivor of a show someone who had persevered by making smart, honest and moral decisions. No longer is the success of a lesser character based on their transformation for the better. Now, the winner is very often someone who will degrade themselves for their portion of fame, or do things that is nothing less than a sign of dehumanization and desperation, either out of greed, the need for attention or some other more complicated construct. Our children see that the ends does indeed justify the means. It is okay to lie or be ruthless to get another person eliminated off of a show. It is alright to betray or gang up on another person to win a prize or be Number One. Indeed, many of the reality show heroes have been ruthless, dishonest, unfair and not the slightest bit gracious.

Most people will say, "So what? It's entertainment. Besides, that's how the real world is out there anyway...Dog eat dog..." But is it really? Look at the country today. Consider the lack of respect children have for their elders, whether it be their parents, teachers or law enforcement. Consider the violence that has escalated among today's American youth. Kids will kill each other over an iPOD, and shoot each other in their own schools. I am aware that television is not the only influence. Many, including myself will argue that overexposure to video games plays a part. Many will credit the moral decline of this nation to the decreasing influence of religion. Schools blame lack of support from parents and law enforcement; parents blame schools that have a hard time upholding a "no tolerance" policy, and so on. Many of these are important factors to be considered and debated in another article.

Television, however, is something that is in just about every household. Parents, often without realizing it, use the television as a babysitter, or do not monitor and talk to their children about what is being watched. The entertainment industry is more interested in ratings and how to get more viewers rather than the quality of their programming. Our children, as a result, process the notion that desperation, greed, being a backstabbing "friend", lying and degrading oneself for money or fame, is the all-time "reality".