A Poem Based on a Joyce Meyer Sermon: My Soul is on Vacation

It sounds trite, and simplistic. Sometimes that is what I need. I need something simpleand easy to repeat out loud or to myself. We have a lot of extended family problems. I have grandchildren that I am worried about as well as some adult children that I worry about also. When your children hurt, you hurt too. What can I do? Not a whole hell of a lot? Pardon my French.

I sometimes have to express myself in not very socially appropriate language. My mother is dying of cancer. She is alcoholic, and a very vile, evil, woman. I still have compassion for her, and a part of me will always love her. I have forgiven her but choose not to be in her life. This is stressful too. My first father, not my biological father has Alzheimer's and my biological father will probably not outlive my mother because his heart is really bad.

There is a lot of loss and grief in my life, so what do I do? I pray, pray, pray and pray some more. I don't see a lot of results, but I still do it, that is all that I can do.

I also have to count my blessings, of which I have many. I have a lovely daughter that is one of the biggest blessings in my life, along with her husband, who is like a son to us. Her sons are amazing young men and I love and enjoy them. My youngest son is a wonderful blessing along with my husband. He is our surprise, our only child together. It amazes me how much he loves me too. He is affectionate, loving, and kind. I have many friends and I thank God for them. I also thank God for the talents that he has given me.I think that because I am an artist, that I am able to purge myself of a lot of the pain from my past. I also love to teach others. It has helped me to deal with depression and grief.

I also thank God for helping us survive our financial disaster. Sometimes just counting the blessings lifts the budens in our lives, but for now I need to bleed out my grief.

This poem is in response to all of the pain, grief, illness and madness that is going on in my life.

My soul is on vacation.

My soul is in God's hands.

I gently turn all my relations,

Over to you Lord with no demands.

I ask you Lord for protection,

Healing and for love,

I ask you for inspection,

Of my soul from up above.

I need to believe,

That you are walking with me,

Not just in the sky,

Oh lord, as I cry.

My soul is on vacation,

From all that it feels it should do,

There is nothing in my finite wisdom,

That I can humanely do.

God, you love them more,

Than I can ever understand,

You love them more,

Than any man can.

My soul is on vacation.

That doesn't mean I don't care,

It means that I am limited,

It doesn't seem quite fair.

But only you God can fix things,

I gently turn them over to you,

There is nothing physically,

That I can do,

My soul is on vacation,

That doesn't mean that I don't pray,

It simply means I will stop my worrying,

If only for today.

Thank you Joyce Meyer for your wisdom, sermon and hope. My soul is on vacation, if only for today. I cannot fix anyone. I cannot make anyone see the error of his or her ways. Today I need to see and look for the positive. I need to love, pray and spend time with those who love me, want to be with me and I need to celebrate life. Just like the rain today, soon will come the flowers, sun and joy. Joy comes in the morning.