A Respone to Chicago's Violence

I am a lifelong resident of Chicago, Illinois. I grew up on the south side in the Englewood area. An area that, even then, had its fair share of violence.

There were times when we kids could not play in Ogden Park because of the gangs shooting each other in the open.

It was something we grew up with and learned to deal with it. After a while, it seemed to stop, or at least, slow down enough for us kids to have a normal life and enjoy ourselves at the park.

Now those days are gone...

The last four years have shown themselves to be the most violent in recent history for our youth. There have been close to one hundred deaths of students in the Chicago Public School system. And this does not account for those who survived violent attacks.

We who grew up between 1960 - 1990 can remember hearing of gangs and their "turf wars". You knew what gang was going to fight, when and where. You sometimes even those involved.

The fight would go down, fists were flying, the occasional bat, stick. Brick, knife were used, as threats mostly. Someone would invariably think they were Bruce Lee and begin kicking and chopping with little to no effect in many instances. However, when the fight was finally over, the worst seen were black eyes, bloody lips, noses, and maybe a busted jaw. But everyone, for the most part, walked or limped away to fight again another day.

Not today.

Today's children have access to shotguns, automatics, Uzi's and more. Many are better armed than the United States' own military in Afghanistan, Iran, Iraq and Pakistan combined.

Moreover, they know how to use them.

On any given street corner, you are likely to find remnants of memorials left for the fallen children. A string from a deflated balloon, pieces of envelopes and cards with messages of sympathy and condolences, maybe even candle wax remains. These remind the neighborhood that a child died near here at the hands of some violent act.

It reminds us all that another life has been senselessly ended.

My question is: Where did it all go so terribly wrong? How did we end up in this insanity? And, where do we go from here?

There was a time when parents openly and freely administered discipline to their children without fear of repercussion from the police or DCFS.
Then Uncle Sam stopped that.

At the slightest tremor of a possible spanking, children began crying out, "Imma call 9-1-1 on you!" and parents shrieked back in fear. Now the children had the upper hand. They had control.

That's where we went wrong!

In my day, all my mom had to do was look at me and I straightened up right quick. And didn't think twice about it because I knew if I did anything to embarrass her - at any time, public or private - my ass was grass and she was the lawn mower. Bottom line. There was no back talk, threatening, stomping off, etc. You stood there, took your punishment, and got out their face as soon as they said so. You held back your tears or you might get more.

More importantly, parents took seriously their responsibilities as parents. If you got in trouble, they stepped, accepted their part in it and made you pay your debt (jail time, community service, etc.) and then they'd get their shot at your behind.

Today, too many parents want to blame the schools, the streets, the police and everybody but the real cause these children have gone "buck wild" - THEMSELVES.

They want to hide behind the laws and "being overworked" as an excuse not to raise their children properly.

My momma once told me as we were talking one day, "I wish you would've ever told me you'd call the police on me for doing my job. I would've told you I'll call for you and in the time it'd take them to get to you, I'd beat your behind but good. Then, once they arrived, they could have what's left of you. Let them take care of you".

I knew she was serious. I was glad I was grown and knew better growing up of what not to do.

Wonder where I learned right from wrong? Oh yeah - my momma.

Parents: BE PARENTS. Not buddies, friends, or pals with your children. That is what you send them to school, church, extra-curricular activities (sports, drama class, dance) for - to make friends. You are their to administer DISCIPLINE. To instruct them on what's right, what's wrong and the difference between the two.

Further, you teach them the consequences of doing one versus the other.

Maybe you need to better understand the word "discipline". Let me break it down for you...

Dis-ci-pline
Show Spelled Pronunciation [dis-uh-plin] Show IPA noun, verb, -plined, -plin⋅ing.
-noun
1. training to act in accordance with rules; drill: military discipline

2. activity, exercise, or a regimen that develops or improves a skill; training: A daily
stint at the typewriter is excellent discipline for a writer.

3. punishment inflicted by way of correction and training.

If you are a Christian, you know Christ had disciples, men who not only followed Him, but did what they could to emulate or imitate him in all they did.

When your child is properly disciplined, they will reflect your character - the good part. Self-control, patience, love, intelligence, all of the good things people said about you as you were growing up. The things your parents instilled in you and made them proud to say, "There goes my son/daughter!"

But, if they never learn these things from you, they will learn negative, destructive, and life-ending behaviors from the streets. You do reflect that which you are most exposed to.

Who does your child act like most? You or the thug down the street. You or the prostitute on the next block? You or the drug addict next door. Whose disciple are they? And why?

And what are you going to do about it?

The cry has been heard repeatedly, "We need to take back our streets", and we do. But before that can happen - mothers, fathers, aunts, uncles, grandparents, step-parents - YOU need to take your child back.

Take them back to the way it was when you were their age. Take them back to the days of, "Do what I say or I'll beat your behind till you can't sit down". Take them back to the time when respect was given before it was taken. Take them back to the days of, "Yes, sir/no, sir. Thank you and please".

No more will you take their "talkin' back". No more of them raising their hand against you in anger before you "lay them out first". No more children who don't pay a bill, do chores, or even offer such, running the house.

We need - no, you parents need to take back your children. Raise them correctly, in the fear of God and you. Raise them to have respect for you, themselves, others and life. Raise them to know they are special and loved and know they have a hope and a future if they do the right things.

That's your responsibility. That's your job - not mine.

Do your job, so the police and the mortician won't have to...RAISE YOUR CHILDREN.

Raise your children so the undertaker doesn't have to lower another child into their grave.