A Winter Tradition

The winter months are a time for hot cocoa, candles in the window as a welcome home gesture, and of course the giving and receiving of gifts. It is a time to show and share with your friends, family and neighbors the fruits of the harvest and make sure that they are well provided for in the long coming months of the dormant growing season.

Many of the world religions teach and encourage the art of giving unselfishly this time of year, in hopes that both the giver and the receiver feel the bounty and warmth of the season. Sadly, though, with the rush of sales, commercialization, as well as the feeling of obligatory gift giving running rampant throughout much of American society, sometimes the reasons why the gifts are given and received, the reason why this time of year is held sacred and celebrated by nearly every culture around the globe is lost in a gray winter haze.

So how does one remember, how does one remind oneself why they are wrapping that perfect gift for Aunt Rachel? Is it because Aunt Rachel needs yet another trinket to put on her shelf? Or does Mom really need or want yet another oven mitt or necklace? Perhaps it is something more than a need or a desire on the side of your friends and family for objects to symbolize your love and affection for them. Perhaps the underlying theme of this time of year isn't the hustle and chaos of the sales, or even the off-key carolers that come to your door. Perhaps the real underlying idea during this whole time is charity. Not because an religious icon or messiah, or deity says that you must be charitable, but because without such charity, without such a hand to lift a person up or shelter them from a storm, all the bounty and riches in the world would mean nothing.

For a number of years, my husband and I have not given gifts to each other over the holidays. Yes, money has been tight, but the real reason that we don't partake in the giving of tangible gifts is that we know we can give each other and those around us so much more. Each day, we find something nice to do for each other. A post-it-note saying "I love you" on a laptop as work approaches, or a phone call over lunch just to see how the day has been going are simple ways to let each other know how truly blessed we feel.

On days when the cold is biting at our windows and the neighborhood kids are waging a snowball fight, we'll provide some warm hot cocoa, and offer to watch them play in our yard so that the parents can go inside and warm up with some coffee. We'll help out at the local Catholic Church, St. Mary's when they host the bingo night for the local senior citizens. Or, we'll simply sit and talk with the neighbor down the street who can't get out as much since she broke her hip a few months ago.

No gifts are given or received, no boxes lie underneath trees or around menorahs, but something else is shared. Memories, charity, and truly finding out and learning about the people that share our world, and our lives. What greater gift is there that that?