Abrupt Solitude: Chapter Four

Arras lay upon a park bench, gazing at the heavens above wherein another world existed. Tiers of thick clouds were layered upon one another. The billowy mountainous formations possessed the unmistakable quality of serenity. Arras longed for that peaceful serenity for his soul had become restless since being unduly separated from Elyria. At a deeper level, his thoughts traced the chain of causality that led to the unavoidable and inevitable state of affairs.

"It's a hero's journey. That's what it is" he glanced over at his dog to ensure a living presence was there to receive his words, "Yet, I don't know"

The dog wagged his tail.

"I don't know if I have the courage required for a hero's journey?"

The dog stood, walked over and licked Arras' face.

Arras recalled the words of a man who once said that during one's lifetime, there would be at least one occasion wherein a hero's journey would be required. For Arras, that calling arrived through the presence of Elyria.

As Arras recalled, it was not a hero that was called upon to embark on a journey. It was the journey itself that was heroic and it was to be taken by a person of ordinary stature. Such an undertaking required the weary traveler to reach into a deep pool of under utilized qualities to aid in this epic journey. Arras always questioned his capacity for courage.

"I don't know?" he whispered

Elyria sat in the pew with her mother and father on either side. Occasionally, she stood, sat and knelt as was mandated by the church ritual. On this particular Sunday, the initiation of such acts required her mother to tug at the hem of her dress. Elyria, though seated within the church, roamed freely with Arras in the park across the street.

Elyria knew Arras was there for he had made a promise to her. As agreed, once their relationship was discovered, they would remain faithful and committed to one another. Since being separated, Arras never missed a Sunday. Through the most egregious elements, he remained steadfast and vigilant to his word. She loved that about him.

Elyria felt the phantom manifestation of his hand, warm and caressing, take hold of her own. She felt the brush of his lips, soft and inviting, on her ivory cheek. She felt the warmth of his breath on her neck as he softly whispered "I love you".

"Elyria, pay attention" her mother, with harsh whisper, admonished.

Her father glanced over at what he considered a scene.

Lena, Elyria's sister, turned and cast a stern and knowing glance at her. She knew Elyria's thoughts lingered across the street to the park where Arras sat with his dog. Lena glanced at her mother and father as if to say, "We must do something about this".

As for Elyria, any proclamations of love went unheard among those who "cared" for her. It was a half educated State worker with a forty minute test, created in a language twice removed from Elyria's native tongue, which deemed her incapable and unworthy of those attributes allotted to the masses of "normal" people. Thus, she would be "kept" for the remainder of her life.

Conventional wisdom stated that those of a lesser capacity should be placed on a matrix composed of objectives. Life was to be completed as such, never experienced. For one's own protection, the environment was to be controlled to an absurd level. By State decree, ordinary people with little or no education were raised to the status of gods.

These gods would define the parameters of Elyria's life. They did their utmost to control each and every facet of her so-called life. Accordingly, love was not to be ventured. Love was an unattainable quality. Love was nectar meant only for the gods. Thus, any proclamation as such went unheard.

Arras was once a god but discovered, through his travels, that he was merely mortal. Unceremoniously, he was invited to leave the realm of gods. Thus, he was cast into the living breathing world where now he sat gazing at the heavens, taking his place among the other mere mortals.

People began to trickle out of the church. Arras hoped to catch a glimpse of Elyria. More importantly, he wanted Elyria to catch a glimpse of him, so he could demonstrate his continued commitment to her.

Elyria emerged from the church and stood atop the stoop. She quickly surveyed the park and saw something that gladdened her heart. There stood Arras with his dog by his side. For that instant, a connection existed between them. For that fleeting moment, she owned that tiny piece of time; the smallest droplet cast forth from the sea of infinite time belonged to her. Best of all, she held his heart in her hand.

Over the past few weeks, Arras felt a tremendous void in his chest. It was accompanied by an emptiness the likes of which he had never before experienced. At odd moments, he was given to weeping spells. Arras discovered a correlation between the appearances of hope or the lack thereof, and these feelings of desperation.

As they maintained their brief connection, Arras felt hope arise and the feelings of emptiness dissipate. He began to worry as to whether this brief encounter had the power to sustain him for yet another week.

"What are you doing? Let's go. Don't worry about what waits for you over there. You treat mother and father with such disrespect"

"No!" Elyria snapped back at her sister.

From behind, her mother and father approached with wide-eyed amazement. Elyria had never spoken back so disrespectfully. The three caretakers exchanged glances while Elyria descended the stairway. The gaze she shared with Arras was never broken. The three turned and glared at the man standing across the street.

"We must do something about this" Lena turned and walked away.