Abstinence Help Guide: How to Handle Situations that Often Arise

Many people choose to become abstinent because it's the only 100% method to protect against unplanned pregnancies. Plus, with an estimated 19 million new STD cases every year, remaining abstinent will protect you against this. By practicing abstinence, you allow yourself to have the time to develop your education and career prior to starting a family, and abstinence is known to be a self-esteem booster as well. While there are numerous benefits from abstinence it isn't an easy thing for everyone. Not everyone will understand your reasons for abstaining from sexual activities, and this can often cause difficult situations to arise. You can learn how to deal with the difficult situations before they happen.

My partner wants to have sex.

It's not uncommon for someone practicing abstinence to be in a relationship with a person who may not share their views. For this reason, it's important to let your partner know you are abstinent at the beginning of the relationship so the issue doesn't arise after you've developed a serious relationship. Even if you have discussed this issue with your partner at the beginning of your relationship, your partner may decide they want to have sex. If this happens, explain your reasons for being abstinent. Basically, it will come down to that your partner will respect your choice or they wont. And if they don't, it will probably be time to end the relationship.

Is oral sex included in abstinence?

Generally, abstaining from oral sex is a personal choice. When some people abstain from sex, they also abstain from oral sex, but not everyone. The answer depends on your personal choice and your own beliefs. You should find your answer before caught in a situation that may end with oral sex so you don't make a hasty choice.

I was previously sexually active.

Many people decide to become abstinent after they were previously sexually active. There is nothing wrong with this. It's never too late to decide to become abstinent. Some people only become abstinent for a few months or a year, until they are in a committed relationship. There's no rule guide that states once abstinent always abstinent or that you have to be abstinent from the beginning or not at all.

My friends laugh at my choice.

It's not uncommon, especially for men, to experience peer pressure when practicing abstinent. If this occurs, you simply explain your reasons for making your choice and they agree with your choice or they don't. There's nothing wrong with abstinence. In fact, more and more people are making the choice to become abstinent each and everyday so you'll never be alone in your decision. If your friends continue to show their dislike for your choice, it may be time to find some new friends.

References:

"Statistic of Teen Sex" Virginity Rules
"Abstinence and Sex Education" Avert
"Abstinence" Open Education