Accepting Age: 10 Things that Remind Me of How Old I Really Am

Age is mind over body. I personally do not feel 'old.' However, I know that I'm not a spring chicken either. In three years, I'll be hitting the 40 year milestone. It's amazing how fast time slips away if you don't pay attention to it. Although I'm coming of age, the best part of being 'old' is the experience & being able to share that experience with others. Fooling others into thinking that you are younger than what it says on your driver's license is fun, too.

1. Receiving an invitation to my 20th year high school reunion.
I got the invitation a few weeks back and was mildly shocked after realizing that the reunion was set for the 20th year. I still feel as if I had just barely graduated, preparing for the best of what was yet to be. The years have gone by so quickly. I often wondered what makes a person want to attend their 20th High School Reunion. To me, my high school years were my awkward years. I'm actually relieved that I'm older and past those adolescent years.

2. Seeing freckles on my face despite not being Caucasian.
When I think of freckles, I imagine fictional characters with red hair and fair complexions like 'Pippi Longstocking' & 'Little Orphan Annie.' Now when I look in the mirror, I see my own freckles on my Filipino face and realize that I should have been wearing more sunscreen during those frolics at the beach during my younger years. As the matured responsible woman that I am today, I won't get caught without wearing my facial moisturizer with 30 SPF sunscreen.

3. Having Prince's "Purple Rain" as the only recognizable song being played at my 27 year old sister-in-law's birthday party.
We attended my sister-in-law's 27th birthday party a few weeks ago. She had South Border, a famous Filipino R & B Band, provide the entertainment. Having heard their extensive repertoire of music that evening, the band clearly had talent and could easily be compared to American boy bands like Boys II Men, the Backstreet Boys and even NSYNC. My age began to show when I couldn't recognize any of the music that they were playing except for Prince's Song, 'Purple Rain' that was popular back in the eighties.

4. Hearing people think my mom is my sister -- when in fact, she is 62 years old.
Luckily, my mom was blessed with a youthful appearance. She is a sheer believer of wearing moisturizer, sunscreen and all the beauty creams available to tap into the fountain of youth. Her numerical age just makes me feel older; to be told that I look like her sister makes me wonder, "then do they think that I am her younger 50 year old sister?!" Nonetheless, my mom looks great at 62 and I only hope I could look as youthful as she does when I'm that age.

5. Hearing my friends' introduce me to their children as 'Auntie' or 'Tita.'
In the Filipino culture, we show respect to our elders through various terms of endearment like 'Auntie or Tita' although there may not be any familial relationship. When I was younger, I used to think that "Auntie or Tita" was reserved only for the older ladies. I guess I've become one of those older ladies. I say, "Just call me Ate (pronounced ah-teh) instead" which means big sister. But lately, I've been getting funny looks when I ask to be called "ate."

6. Catching myself tell my daughters: "When I was a little girl, I...." stories.
To prove a point or to teach my girls a life lesson, I find myself saying, "When I was a little girl, I...." I've become my all knowing, omnipotent mother.

7. Hitting the dance floor and realizing that your dance steps are mostly from the 1980's.
I was in high school in the eighties. It only makes sense that my most memorable dance steps should come from that era. My husband and I recently attended our company Christmas Party where we showcased our best dance moves: the Cabbage Patch, the Roger Rabbit, the Wop, the Running Man and the Smurf. We had a blast, but I think we scared away the teenagers.

8. Viewing others on the dance floor and admiring the dancers who can 'ballroom dance.'
Dancing with the Stars is a popular reality show these days. I am certain my fascination to ballroom dancing can be explained by the popularity of that show. I just admire those couples who can work together and perform so gracefully. When I was younger, I had the misconception that ballroom dancing was only for the 'old fogies' and scoffed at the adults who'd do the 'swing' or 'foxtrot' when we wanted the DJ to play more 'hip-hop' in the eighties. In my older age, I'll admit that my husband & I have taken about three sessions of ballroom dance classes. We hope to conquer the dance floor with our skills someday.

9. Watching a Community Filipino Dance Group perform and hearing someone comment, 'Remember, when you used to dance the Filipino dances up there?'
In my twenties, I was part of the United Filipino Association of the Inland Empire that taught the youth to dance Filipino folk dances as part of their efforts to pass down Filipino traditions & culture onto the next generation. We performed various folk dances like 'tinikling, sayaw sa bangko, subli, pandanggo sa ilaw,' and others that required a great deal of physical energy, jumping over sticks and atop benches, rolling on the floor, etc. At age 37, I no longer have the stamina to roll on the floor with a candle on my head as in the "Pandanggo sa Ilaw" dance.

The other night, we watched a local group of Filipinos (in their twenties) perform at the Simbang Gabi at St. Peter & St. Paul Church in Rancho Cucamonga. It was a joy to see the youth perform folk dances from the Philippines. During the performance, someone tapped me on the shoulder and said, "Remember, when you used to dance the Filipino dances up there?" How could I forget? Now, we are the ones teaching our children the Filipino folk dances we learned years ago.

10. Having pride while hearing the audience applaud my girls as they finished singing their song at the local Christmas Church Party.
My daughters love to sing in front of a crowd. In fact, their most recent performance was for the Filipino Cursillo Group of the Diocese of San Bernardino. They stirred up the audience with their bouncy upbeat Christmas song and enthusiastic hand motions, smiles and perky expressions. The crowd roared with delight and offered our girls such positive feedback with their applause and cheers. I was so proud of our little girls for overcoming their insecurities to be able to sing for an audience of over 200 people.

To feel pride & joy for my own children's accomplishments is something that I did not imagine when I was younger; it is one of the many rewards for being "old."

I look fondly back at my 37 years and look forward to what the next 37 years will be like. As with high school, I'm still hopeful and preparing for the best of what is yet to be...like winning the California Lotto and losing the 20 lbs. I gained after my kids were born.