Accepting the Parenting Styles of Others

Quoting the Simpsons,
Marge: Homer, it's easy to criticize.
Homer: Fun, too.

How do we know our parenting way is the best way? Everyone's situations and children are different and what works for one family may not work the same for someone else's. I guess accepting others parenting styles is the same as being tolerant of other people in general. Do you stick your nose in someone else's business and try to tell them what to do with their life? What do you hope to accomplish by interfering? Do you actually think they will change? We need to be accepting of other parent's styles in order to maintain a good relationship with them. Accepting something isn't the same as agreeing with it.

"Pete's parents let him stay out until 9:00 on a school night, why can't I?" complains your son. Every parent is faced with this dilemma at some point. A parent's style does not always affect how their child behaves. A parent with questionable rules may have a child who is actually a good influence on your child. When I was younger I took any dare. I was fearless. My parents always thought my friends were bad influences on me, but the truth was I initiated the mischievous behavior most of the time. My parents were strict with curfews and other issues, so I rebelled. I had to 'live it up' when I was out because I had to be home by 10:00 and everyone else was out partying until midnight. I remember sneaking out the basement window a few times... Parents don't always have a grasp of the entire situation.

What goes on between another parent and child is none of your business unless you witness or suspect child abuse of happening. Their rules on curfew, junk food, television watching, wearing make-up, dressing provocatively and using the car may annoy you, but you need to respect their decisions. What's acceptable at someone else's house isn't the same as what's acceptable at yours. You need to tell your children this again and again. They need to know your house rules and what the consequences will be if they don't abide by them. Teach your children to be able to think for themselves from a young age and it will pay off in dividends. Even adults deal with peer pressure on a daily basis.

Finally, don't say negative things about someone else's parent in front of your child. It won't help you accomplish anything positive. What would you do if another parent judged you? I think Cliff Huxtable from the Cosby Show says it best with "I've got five children... I don't need to prove anything to anybody!"