Active Vs. Passive Communication in the Age of Technology

I have several friends who would rather call than e-mail me. I find the phone extremely annoying, and always have. I don't mind the occasional chit chat with someone I haven't spoken to for a while, and I wouldn't be the least upset if someone called instead of e-mailed to tell me that I had just inherited a million dollars. Other than those two scenarios though, please just send me an e-mail.

Active Communication: The Phone
When I receive a phone call, I have drop everything I was doing and devote near 100% of my attention to the device at my ear. If the phone call ends up being a long one, my elbow and wrist get cramped. While I'm talking to the person on the other end of the line I can't talk to anyone else, unless I switch-over using the call-waiting function, but then the original caller is well, waiting. And I'm still on the phone.

I tend to keep odd hours and so does my significant other. If the phone rings and wakes us up for something completely unimportant, we get upset. Heck, even if the phone call is important, I'm still likely to become annoyed. The sound of a phone ringing instantly raises my blood pressure. I hate it. I understand if it is the only available means of communication at the time, but that doesn't cause me to like it any better.

I also understand that sometimes, you'd just like to hear someone's familiar voice. I do. I really do! I have been there myself. As I noted, there are definite exceptions, but in general, I find the phone to be a rude and loud intrusion in my otherwise peaceful day. Especially because nineteen of twenty phone calls are completely useless and unimportant.

Passive Communication: E-mail, IM, Text
If I'm working on an article or story, or busy in the garage on some project and I cannot reasonably answer the phone, I would prefer an e-mail. The sender does not realistically expect an immediate response, and I can then communicate when it's convenient for me. Then, when it's convenient for them, they can respond in kind. It's beautiful that way. Besides, since I work at home, I am almost always able to check email once an hour or so. If not, once every couple of hours to be sure. It just works out for everyone. I'm not answering the phone if I'm welding or am covered to my elbows in grease. So when it rings and I do not answer, both I and the caller become unnecessarily annoyed. Please, just e-mail me.

Likewise with instant messaging, or IM. If there is something urgent and you see that I am on line and available, send me an IM and if I'm at the computer, I will respond immediately. Then, if I do not respond you can try e-mailing me and then, only as a last resort, give me a call and cause something in my house to ring, annoying everyone. My IM identity is available on most of the forums I peruse and to all my friends, so if you are unable to IM me then I probably don't know you very well and, therefore, how urgent could your "call" be?

I have never in my life sent or received a text message, but I understand and approve of the means of communication. Similar to an e-mail or IM, I can respond to your text message whenever it is convenient for me. If that happens to be right away, great! If it doesn't, then we both have to wait a bit. Is that so bad? The law says we aren't supposed to talk on our cell-phones while driving anymore, so it sounds like a good idea to send a text first, just to be safe. In an extreme emergency of course, a phone call is completely acceptable. Some things are good to know immediately.

The thought occurred to me that maybe some folks are just old, and set in their ways, and are much more used to the phone than all this electronic business. That would be fine, except that my sixty-seven year old father e-mails me quite frequently. In fact, I can't remember the last phone call. He knows that's how I prefer it, and so that's how we communicate largely. Of course, he has never been a big phone fan either, so I think it works out for both of us.

Also, if you do not have access to the Internet for whatever reason hey, I get it. Let me know that and I'll answer your call when I see it come up on my phone. I really will. But for those of you who have Internet access and still pick the phone up and call me, likely the same phone you could electronically message me from, I'll listen to your message and e-mail you back. Everyone I know is aware that I work at home, on the computer. It really is the fastest way to get in touch with me. While there may be some die-hard phone lovers remaining out there, I'd be willing to bet that most the folks who read this article feel similar to the way I do. Please just send an e-mail or IM. Thank you.