ADD/ADHD and Public Schools

My son is hyper. Anyone can see that. Years ago, kids were hyper and it wasn't a syndrome. Well, now it is a syndrome.... or maybe it isn't... it all depends on who you talk to. In any event, he was officially diagnosed with ADD/ADHD. Frankly, to me, it's no big deal--- he's a high-energy kid that needs high-energy outlets. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure it out.

There's the camp that says the term "hyper" is politically incorrect, these children have ADD/ADHD and need to be medicated. Then there's the camp that says there's no such thing as ADD/ADHD and Ritalin is handed out to children like candy at Halloween. And then there's everything in between- bad parenting, too much red dye, and not enough fish oils cause these kids to act out.

The whole hyper thing never bothered me. My son is curious, bright, and out-going. These are all good things. It was the school that had a problem with him. First grade was a nightmare for my son. His teacher was an older woman- two years away from a set-for-life state pension- and completely burned out. She had absolutely no business working with children, particularly hyper kids. I asked to have my son moved to another classroom, but the school had a policy against it.

He suffered through that school year and has nightmares about his first-grade teacher to this day. (Despite therapy.) I made regular visits- scheduled and unannounced- to the school that year, but my concerns were pooh-poohed by administrators. The school's stance was that they were education professionals, and I was only a mother.

Second grade was better. His teacher thought self-control was an important skill for second-graders to learn. His behavior was no big deal to her- she'd seen it a million times. That year was uneventful, as were third, fourth, and fifth grades.

Toward the end of his fifth-grade year, I felt that he should be a little more mature than he actually was, so I brought it up with his pediatrician. He suggested I bring him to a behavioral therapy center, which seemed rather extreme to me, so I passed. I did, however, opt to take him to a psychologist.

The psychologist was quite helpful. He explained that Nick has an impulse control disorder, which totally made sense. In a nutshell, it means that Nick is incapable of the self-talk that we all take for granted. For example, when most people see a stop sign they don't even realize that they have an internal conversation. "There's a stop sign. Slow down. Come to a complete stop. Look right. Look left. Look right again. Is it all clear? Yes? OK. Go ahead. It's safe to go now."

The psychologist told me that the only way to "cure" Nick was through medication. He said no amount of "good parenting", dietary considerations, or exercise programs could cure it, only medication could. So, guess what I did. I put my kid on medication to control ADHD.

Nick seemed to respond well, in a way. Let's say his behavior was definitely "controlled". We changed medications and strengths a few times, but in the end we stopped using meds entirely. Nick didn't like being "someone else" and I was resented the fact that I had to dope him up to meet the school's standards. Turning my son into a lemming in order to make someone else's job easier just wasn't part of the life I had envisioned for him.

Middle school was a bit better because, honestly, I think Nick had several hyper teachers. Those teachers thought he was funny and bright, and they enjoyed having him in the classroom. When I went to his sixth-grade conference his teacher said, "I'm sure you hear this every year: He's a great kid." I had actually never heard that. Nick was not on medication and they loved him.

High school was not the warm fuzzy experience that middle school was. "Dope 'em up, and diploma 'em out" is their motto. OK, not really, but there's a lot more truth than jest to that statement.

The bottom line on public schools and kids with ADD/ADHD is: Teachers are not equipped to deal with hyper kids. And they should be. What a huge disservice it is to these children. The only course of action the high school has is to recommend medication. And the only benefit to medicating a child is that it makes the teacher's job easier.

So what's the solution? Should ADD/ADHD be classified as a disability? Yes, yes, and resoundingly, yes. You would think that as a parent of a hyper kid I would be saying no, but I know first-hand that the needs of hyper children are not being met by the public school system. If ADD/ADHD is classified as a disability, the school would be required to meet the needs of these children.