Addicted to Sex

There is no actual official diagnosis for sex addiction but it is becoming more widely known lately, particularly since one of the key players in the show Californication booked himself into a rehabilitation centre for sex addicts. A few other famous names have also done so in recent years including Michael Douglas.
It was when Michael Douglas 'came out' as a sex addict that I first started to consider sex addiction was possible. I'd watched a few Michael Douglas films and had always been struck by what I considered to be the authenticity of his sex scenes. Somehow when Michael did sex in a movie it struck me as real whereas just about nearly all other sex scenes I've ever seen in other movies, or on TV seemed far, far more staged and hardly 'real' at all.
So only when Michael booked himself into 'rehab' did it occur to me that I may have spent nearly two decades of my life living with a sex addict. Luckily for me I guess he was the faithful sort who, as my mother puts things "came home to eat". "Doesn't matter where they get their appetite", she would say, "as long as they eat at home". Though many sex addicts do not do that and amongst the list of symptoms is compulsive philandering and infidelities. Living with an 'ever ready' sex machine seemed to have it's payoffs as far I was concerned at the time, though if you read my other article about the symptoms of sexual abuse you may be able to gain an insight into why I never questioned his behaviour at the time.
Often people who are addicted to sex also have other addictions; such as drugs, alcohol, gambling, food etc. Certainly my ex had a concurrent addiction to drugs.

There are many therapists and psychologists who argue that sex addiction is more like a compulsive disorder such as OCD (compulsive obsessive disorder) than an addiction.

Michael Herkov, Ph.D, on the Psych Central website gives us the following information and definition of sex addiction;
He says that "Whilst there is no official diagnosis for sex addiction, clinicians and researchers have attempted to define the disorder using criteria based on chemical dependency literature. They include:
Frequently engaging in more sex and with more partners than intended, being preoccupied with or persistently craving sex; wanting to cut down and unsuccessfully attempting to limit sexual activity, thinking of sex to the detriment of other activities or continually engaging in excessive sexual practices despite a desire to stop, spending considerable time in activities related to sex, such as cruising for partners or spending hours online visiting pornographic Web sites, neglecting obligations such as work, school or family in pursuit of sex, continually engaging in the sexual behavior despite negative consequences, such as broken relationships or potential health risks, escalating scope or frequency of sexual activity to achieve the desired effect, such as more frequent visits to prostitutes or more sex partners and feeling irritable when unable to engage in the desired behavior".
The site goes on further to add that, "You may have a sex addiction problem if you identify with three or more of the above criteria. More generally, sex addicts tend to organize their world around sex in the same way that cocaine addicts organize theirs around cocaine. Their goal in interacting with people and in social situations is obtaining sexual pleasure". Mark S. Gold, M.D., and Drew W. Edwards, M.S. contributed to this article.
(http://psychcentral.com/lib/2006/symptoms-of-sexual-addiction/ September 2^nd 2008).

Visit their site if you're interested in learning more or if you might like to find out if you or your partner may have an unhealthy attitude to sex.

Keep posted.