Adolescence

According to Sullivan's theory, adolescent's main goal is to establish intimate relationships with the opposite sex. The intimacy is created with same sex friendships, and that grows into romantic emotions for others. Sullivan also thought that intimacy is expressed, not learned. Of course, girls express it more than boys do because boys aren't encouraged to. Teenage girls view opposite sex relationships as a time for love, emotional involvement, and intimacy. Therefore, girls teach boys how to be sensitive and caring. (pp. 354-355)

For some teens, intimacy doesn't come easy. Connie, the narrator of the case study in Adolescent Portraits, didn't experience intimacy until she joined the support group for the abortion she had. It was then that she experienced intimacy with other women for the first time. She was close to her mom and twin sister, but she still needed to hide the fact that she was pregnant and had an abortion.

Now, according to Anna Freud, the changes that are caused by puberty create tension among the household. The teen turns away from family and towards friends. But recent studies have argued against this theory. Actually, teens get along quite well with their parents.

There are three types of autonomy- emotional, behavioral, and value. Emotional autonomy is "the aspect of independence which is related to changes in the individual's close relationships, especially parents." Behavioral autonomy is "the ability to make independent decisions, and following through with them." Value autonomy is "knowing right from wrong and what is important and what isn't." (p.300) In my opinion, they go hand-in-hand. Emotionally, the teen wants to be independent. He or she needs to be able to make their own decisions, and the opportunity to follow through. This is where behavioral autonomy comes in. Adolescent's detach themselves from their families in that they can make their own choices. Those that are well developed in this aspect will be responsible. For example, a girl wants to go to a party but her parents think it's a bad idea. The girl feels differently. Since they are her friends, she can trust them. So the girl goes to her parents and talks to them. Together they reach a compromise. She doesn't rebel and completely ignore her parents. This is where value autonomy comes in. Teens know what is right and wrong. They can think for themselves. Connie wasn't developed in these three aspects. She made her own decisions, like having sex, but she got pregnant. She then made another choice to have an abortion. But she felt guilty from this, so she had to join a support group.

Why are there so many young girls pregnant? Well, this could be due to several things. One is peer influence. Girls that are friends with teens that are sexually active have a risk of being influenced to have sex themselves. Family is another factor. Teen girls that have parents that talk to her about sex and contraceptives have a lower risk of getting pregnant. Even if she has sex, she knows to use contraceptives. Adolescent boys, on the other hand, have testosterone that affect their body's. Family is equally important in talking to boys. They could be potentially young fathers if they aren't taught about contraception.

Connie didn't have talks with her mother about sex. So she didn't use contraceptives. Therefore, she got pregnant. The father evidently didn't have the talk either. He left her and refused to accept responsibility for his child.

Risk taking behavior is a psychosocial problem. This behavior includes using drugs, having unprotected sex, and risky driving. There are several theories on why this takes place. One is that there is a trait passed down from parent to child. Another one is that experimenting with one thing, may lead to another. For example, a teen tries smoking cigarettes may eventually try marijuana. Then there's social control theory. This is "individuals that do not have close bonds to society's institutions, such as family, school, and the workplace will be more likely to participate in deviant behavior." (p. 443)

Connie said she was close to her mom and sister, so maybe her risky behavior is due to a trait passed down to her. She said her father left her mom, which means he probably didn't have a talk with his parents about sex since he left and didn't want to take responsibility. So maybe he passed the trait down to her.

What is identity? To achieve this, a teen needs to develop a sense of purpose, or a "clarification of ones long term plans and goals." (p. 280) An adolescent knows his or her own identity when they know who they are. It means feeling at home in one's body. Once this happens, the teen has achieved this part in their life. Self concepts come into play here too. If a teen can't figure out who they want to be or what they want to do, they may have low self esteem. This is called Identity diffusion, according to Erik Erikson. (p.280-281) This is also called identity confusion. The actual definition is "incoherent, disjointed, and incomplete sense of one's self.

Connie mentioned having low self esteem. While in school, she said yes to any guy who asked her out. It got worse when she had the abortion. She began to wonder if she did the right thing.

There are four types of parenting- authoritarian, authoritative, Permissive, and neglectful. Authoritarian style of parenting is the strict type. The parent prefers controlled environments and punishments. They don't leave room for their child to be independent or to make decisions for themselves. Authoritative parenting is different. This type of parent respects their child's wishes, and lets them have freedom, but also maintains control. They let their child make independent choices and decisions. Permissive parents are passive. They don't really take control or discipline, but they are warm and loving. Neglectful parents do what is necessary, but then stops at that. They don't take the extra effort to talk to their child about values of life.

It seemed to me that Connie's mother was more Authoritative. Granted, she didn't talk to her daughter about sex or contraception, and she was strict when it came to abortion, but Connie also felt close to her mother. After her father left, she got along rather well with her mother, which leads me to believe that her mother gave her freedom to make choices for herself.

School sex education isn't effective because it usually doesn't start early. Plus, the education covers the biological aspect of sex, but not the emotional part of it. Another problem is the main focus of sex education is that they aim to change the student's knowledge, not the behavior. In my opinion, there is just way too much knowledge out there and the media encourages sexual activity. By the time teens go into sex education, their minds have already been filled with previous ideas.

Section #2

I never realized what parents go through during the time their teen is going through puberty. I know I probably have mentioned this before, but it makes sense that parents would be interested more in their child's life if they themselves are having a difficult time adjusting to their personal life. They are feeling old and they don't see a future ahead of them like their child's. I imagine that would be depressing. But, now that I know, I can use that when I have a child. If my son or daughter starts complaining about me "butting in" their business, I could just sit them down and explain to them what adults are going through at this age. Of course, that doesn't mean they'd listen.

References

Garrod, A., Smulyan, L., Powers, S., & Kilkenny, R. (Eds.). (2005). Proud of the Strength I Had. In Adolescent portraits: Identity, relationships, and challenges (5th ed.) (pp. 292-300). Boston: Allyn & Bacon.

Steinberg, L. (2005). Adolescence (7th ed.). New York: McGraw-Hill.