Adopting a Child: 6 Factors that Impact a Married Couple's Chances

Married couples have an easier time adopting than non married couples, but that doesn't mean that adoption isn't an option for non married individuals or those who are part of a non-traditional couple. The truth of the matter is that any individual or couple who can provide a loving, stable home for a child can adopt. The secret is figuring out what opportunities are open to you.

Although you don not need to be married in order to adopt, obviously, married couples have more options than non married couples. I cannot think of any agency that will not allow a married couple to adopt. In fact, marriage is one of the first requirements that many agencies have. Also, the majority of birthmothers are hoping for a married couple to adopt their child.

Adoption agency restrictions pertaining to your marriage

Of course, just being married is not the magic ticket to adopting. Many adoption agencies have rules regarding marriages of couples looking to adopt. Here are some of the restrictions you may encounter:

• Length of marriage: Some agencies require that you be married for a certain period of time (1 or 2 years usually) before adopting. Some agencies with this type of requirement may factor in any additional time you have spent living together before marriage.

• Restrictions regarding the number of previous marriages: One of the main things an adoption agency looks for is stability. A history of poorly managed marriages may bring into question how steady your current relationship is. Still, whether you have a lot of divorces or only one prior divorce, the social worker will want to discuss thoroughly any prior marriages during your home study.

• Age difference between spouses: Although the difference between your ages is not necessarily a deal breaker, a big age difference such as a 23-year-old married to a 56-year-old, for example, may very well warrant more scrutiny. In some cases, the age difference will cause an adoption agency to decline your application.

The Following Questions May Be Asked About Your Marriage

When you go through your home study interviews, you are going to be speaking a lot about your marriage, and not just about whether you and your spouse agree on how you equally take turns washing the dishes.

You will be telling the social worker things like this:

• How you met your spouse and what your initial dating and courtship were like: This is the enjoyable part. Who doesn't enjoy remembering and telling the story of how you met and fell in love with your soul mate?

• How you and your spouse handle differences: Of course you don't have to agree on everything! And you don't even need to believe in the same religion. You do not need to agree on each other's political beliefs and you can definitely have different ideas on parenting. The main thing you'll need is just to be able to show that you can work through your differences, compromise and work alongside together like a team.

• What you like about your spouse and what annoys you about your spouse: Most individuals don't have a problem with answering these questions since there are many things that spouses' enjoy about each other and equally get irritated about with each other. Of course, for some people, talking about the irritable things is a bit difficult. For others, the really tough part is trying to narrow down such a long list of annoyances.

Believe it or not, the social worker is not looking for the perfect marriage, they are looking for a healthy marriage that works and that can work through the difficulties and pressures of parenting and thus provide stability and consistency for a child.