Adventures in Insomnia: Truth in Advertising

Those of you who have read my previous articles know already that I am a natural insomniac and night dweller. This isn't really a huge deal for me though as I always get to enjoy late night advertisements and infomercials and that's entertainment. Lately though, I've been on a day schedule for work so I thought that my days of being far too entertained by something silly like advertisements were long gone.

This was before I stepped into a grocery store a couple of weeks ago with a friend of mine to do some shopping. I really wasn't looking for anything in particular while she shopped but then I found the one thing in the store that made me completely stop in my tracks. Yes, it was another advertisement and even better, it was quite possibly the worst argument for 'truth in advertising' I'd ever seen.

There I was in the cereal aisle just minding my own business when I see out of the corner of my eye, a name brand cereal clearly labeled 'Now better tasting!' Seriously. Now, I'm all for truth in advertising and I applaud those companies that decide that they want to be honest with their consumers but let's face it, there's 'honest' and then there's HONEST.

You have to give it credit to the company for realizing that their product was crap and needed to taste better but can you imagine how stupid the people who ate the cereal before feel now?

"Bob! That cereal we like is now marked as better tasting! What was wrong with the stuff we were eating before?"

"I don't know Jim, I liked the stuff but I guess my tastes are all screwed up. I knew I should've waited until they improved the taste but no, you said that it was supposed to taste like crap!"

Another moment for me just recently. I had seen the commercial a couple of times in the past but had never really thought much of it until I was watching a football game with my friend and it came up on her television screen. I'm sure that we've all seen the commercial. It's for a truck (I don't remember the name but pick whichever one you think is least likely to sue and insert it mentally) and features a guy driving through the mountains singing "Rock Me Gently".

We're fine so far but then a squirrel hops in the car and starts singing along with him. The man seems a little perplexed but seems to ultimately think nothing of it and continues to drive. Next a bird joins in and again, the man looks slightly confused but ultimately keeps driving. Finally a wolf jumps into the backseat and eats the bird. Finally the man shows some kind of real emotion by giving the wolf a 'Dude! We were singing!' look which makes the wolf spit up the bird and the quartet continues to drive on singing away.

Now, correct me if I'm wrong but I am under the impression that anyone this laid back would have to be dead. Seriously, what would it take to get this guy to crack and get stressed out? I'm guessing that it would be something one step up from waking up to discover that you've been kidnapped by aliens for their intergalactic traveling circus.

With the Super Bowl coming up in just a couple of weeks, I suspect I'm going to find all sorts of new stuff to write about or then again, I could just leave it to the people who actually know how to write.