Advice to Doulas Everywhere: Avoid Burnout

"Burnout is not when you're too busy, too tired, or overworked.
Burnout is when you lose the passion for your work"
- Carla Hartley (Founder & Director of Ancient Art Midwifery Institute)

You haven't had a vacation in two years, the minute you return from a birth your kids need you to resolve the argument of the day, you have four clients whose due dates fall within two weeks of each other, one of your clients will be delivering at a hospital you know is not always understanding of doula techniques, and your "favorite" client called you two minutes ago with yet another "special" request. Are you crazy? Maybe not, but you're likely headed toward a full blown case of doula burnout.

"Burnout," a term coined by psychologist Herbert Freudenberger in 1974, can affect anyone. For a doula, burnout is when you lose the passion for your calling. For example, you might be in the middle of a birth and all you want to do is get it over with so you can get home. Most people experiencing burnout feel emotionally exhausted and devoid of energy. They have a lowered resistance to illness, tend to become more and more dissatisfied and pessimistic, and are more likely to find reasons to not come to work.

Many doulas say that the primary cause of burnout is that of going beyond their limits and feeling overwhelmed by their commitment. They have a hard time setting boundaries between their personal and professional lives. Even if they do try to set boundaries, they find it incredibly difficult to honor them. Exacerbating the problem, and sometimes causing burnout on their own, are the hassles associated with dealing with a medical profession that isn't always open to and supportive of doula techniques, and dealing with difficult clients.

The good news is burnout is not a terminal illness. But you do have to do something about it in order to control it. The following are six techniques you can use to prevent burnout, and even to recover from it:

1. Take care of yourself

Don't ever underestimate the value of taking care of yourself. Just taking a little time for yourself can give you renewed interest in your doula practice. So read, relax, write in your journal, take a bath, or get a massage. Do something you enjoy for at least a few minutes out of each day to recharge and stay in touch with your own needs. If you get ambitious, consider taking some time off.

2. Set limits

Take an honest look at your schedule, your own expectations of yourself, and your clients' expectations of you. Then consider reality:

* How many births/clients can you really handle in a given time frame without burning out?

* How much time can you spend as a doula as opposed to as yourself?

* How much dedicated time off do you need to recharge?

Be true to yourself when you answer those questions, and then let those answers be the limits you set for your practice. Write those limits down, and post them somewhere you can easily see and not forget them. After you've set the limits, honor yourself by sticking to them.

3. Learn to say no

Saying no helps you enforce the limits you set and handle the more difficult clients. When a client asks for something over and above what you know you can provide, say no to the client. If you're about to convince yourself to do something your intuition says you shouldn't do, say no to yourself. While it may be hard to say no when you're trying to be customer-focused, remember that you're setting boundaries to ensure that you provide the best care possible to your clients. If you can't say no, you risk compromising the quality of your service.

4. Find a partner

If you've set your limits, then you've admitted to yourself that you can't do it all. But don't let your practice suffer because of it. Consider connecting with other doulas. You can serve as backups or partners to each other so that you each can work within your own limits (though make sure your clients know from the start that you have a backup or partner). If you have a partner or a backup, you'll find it even easier to give time to yourself when you most need it. If you don't know any doulas in your area, contact local doula groups for referrals.

5. Stay connected

Internalizing your experiences and frustrations can make matters much worse. So work hard to stay connected. After a birth, call a friend, especially a doula friend, to share the ups and downs of how it all went (though be careful of disclosing personal information). Make a deliberate effort to keep in touch with other doulas because they will know and understand the challenges you face. You can meet other doulas through your local doula group, or through message boards such as on www.alldoulas.com.

6. Seek alternative paths

Sometimes making a small change in your routine can completely refresh your outlook. Consider adding some non-birth related activities in your life, such as volunteering or taking a temporary or part-time job in a different field. Or, if you want to remain fully connected with pregnant women, add activities that serve as a complement to your doula business, such as teaching breastfeeding or newborn care classes. If you think you need to make changes to your doula practice, consider practicing in a different way. For example, if you typically participate in hospital births, seek out clients who will do a home birth. Look for changes that you know will add interest, and not burden, to your life.

For many people, burnout is a fact of life. But with a little practice and some deliberate action on your part, you have a much better chance of avoiding it altogether.