Advice for Men: How to Survive a PMSing Woman

Lauren Romano
Although women have to deal with the pain and discomfort of PMS, men often find themselves at the receiving end of everything that comes with it. For about one week before her period, she will seem almost like a different person. While this may not be fair to you, understand that many women try to keep the symptoms controlled.

Some of the symptoms that approximately 85% of women experience include depression, mood swings, irritability, feeling tired and cravings. All women do not have the same levels of PMS; some have it more severe than others and it can vary from month to month. As a man you will never know what it's really like, but try to understand that she doesn't want to feel miserable and, chances are, doesn't like that you have to deal with it.

We don't like it and neither do you but, if you help us, it will help you. If you are one of the many men that have zero idea what to do when the woman in your life is PMSing, there are certain things to say and do that will help you make it out alive.

Don't bring up that she's PMSing... Ever

Chances are she doesn't realize how bad she is. We know we're PMSing and pointing it out to us will make us visualize you sporting a big bulls-eye. If you think she's PMSing, she probably is. Forego saying "You're PMSing aren't you?" or "It must be that time of the month." Keep those thoughts to yourself and prepare for a few days of irrational behavior.

Don't comment about how she's acting

Saying "I know how you feel" or "I understand" will result in her resenting you at the moment because, as a guy, you don't have to deal with it. Do not tell her to "calm down" or "relax." In addition, never say something like "My sister doesn't PMS as bad as you do.". The closest example I can give to what her reaction will probably be like is that of The Incredible Hulk. One minute she's fine but say something along those lines and she'll transform into an angry person capable of ripping your limbs off.

Skip the annoying habits

Everyone has annoying habits that their significant other normally puts up with because it's not a big enough deal to constantly bring up. Rest assured doing these things while she's PMSing will probably be a big deal and result in a conversation, argument, tears or all of the above. For those few days, make a conscious effort to curb the annoying habits.

Help with cravings

A major sign that a woman is PMSing is a change in diet. She'll likely crave random random foods, look at certain foods like she's in love with them and eat more food than a football team. Her eating habits may be a bit erratic and so will her reaction if she doesn't get what she's craving. One of my best friends, who happens to be a guy, called me one day while I was close to hysterics because I didn't have Doritos. On his way home he kindly brought me some and didn't make a comment when he almost lost an arm as I ripped open the bag the minute he handed it to me. Follow his example; if she's really craving something, get it for her if you can. When she devours it like she hasn't eaten in days, don't say a word about it.

Skip the negative comments

Avoid negative comments at all costs unless you want to increase the chances that the woman is going to burst into tears, question if you think she's something she's not (i.e. fat) or go into a rant. Don't make negative comments about her cooking, how she looks, her loved ones or her job. This includes making jokes that you think are funny that, while PMSing, she probably will not find funny in the least. Apologize quickly but don't even try to justify what was said.

Help her

If she asks you to do something for her, avoid saying "Can't you do it?" or "Do I have to?" and make the effort to help her. Surprise her with a little gesture such as a home cooked dinner. PMSing can be quite frustrating between the emotions and thoughts not to mention many women get annoyed at themselves for feeling and acting like they normally wouldn't. Helping her can mean more to her than you realize.

If you want to talk to her about how she acts while she's PMSing or need to talk to her about an issue that could stress her out, wait until after her period is over. Bringing it up while she's PMSing will probably result in an argument. She'll think she's right and you're wrong and nothing will get accomplished. Waiting will allow more of a chance of talking to her rationally and, if necessary, give her a chance to apologize.

Source:

http://www.womenshealth.gov/faq/premenstrual-syndrome.cf

Published by Lauren Romano - Featured Contributor in Arts & Entertainment and Lifestyle

Lauren is a freelance writer that predominantly writes about dating & relationships, celebrities, NYC, pets, decorating, crafts and fashion. She volunteers with animals and is grateful to have a job she...  View profile

9 Comments

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  • Ed8/17/2011

    So...PMS hormones are a license for women to treat others poorly with no consequence?

    You're right that a man should treat her sensitively -- that's courteous, and any man in a relationship should be and would be doing that for his loved one. Even during PMS, shouldn't she be making the same effort? Or is that a week-long vacation from courtesy and manners?

    If she was suffering PMS and was in court, would she allow herself to be disrespectful or short-tempered with the judge and expect to be able to use the excuse, "It's not my fault -- I'm PMS-ing"? Highly unlikely -- she'd exercise more self-control. Is her husband or boyfriend who treats her well any less deserving of her best behavior? If not, why not?

  • Dave4/14/2011

    I was with the same woman for 20 years who just had pain and hardly got moody. I am now with a woman who tears my head off moments after being sweet to me. Our relationship is teetering on disaster due to her craziness...some months worse than others and she has fibroids which are making things worse.

    She only acknowledged and sort of apologizes once for this. But, I am pretty sure she could not sustain past relationships due to this.

    I am thinking (even after 2 years together and marriage plans) I can not live with this...a week or so per month with being yelled at for hours is hell on earth.

    Love women but this is an absolute curse!

  • Angela1/31/2011

    I think men are basically pretty scared of PMS! I have been lucky to have a pretty understanding guy, but I have made his life hell on occasion. I made a YouTube about my experiences, and everything I've tried for it - check it out if you are interested at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MToFTLXYINQ

  • Sophie S10/25/2010

    I agree that mentioning that we're PMSing does not help! My husband does this at times, and I've tried to tell him how annoying it is, especially when you have no control over your hormones and behaviour.
    Sophie

  • Wiley Vaughn10/11/2010

    These tips would also work when your guy has a bad day! Just a reminder ladies!

  • Abby Willow10/4/2010

    My man thinks everything "female" is a blessing- he's jealous I get to PMS and have the ability to give birth, and loves when I'm being "girly", but I'm sure he is not the norm. He is simply fascinated by all our female mysteries

  • Julia10/4/2010

    Those PMS moments can add stress to a realtionship for sure. Great advice

  • Angel Vee9/30/2010

    Solid work!

  • Lady Samantha9/29/2010

    When I'm pmsing --give me sex or get away from me-that'sm y motto--did i say that? lol

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